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Why Are There So Many “People of Color” in the Projects?

I used to wonder why so many “people of color” were living in the “Projects” in Asheville NC, which is my hometown. Surely, most of them want to work and live a dignified life like most Americans.  Everyone has their own thoughts, but I am going to share mine. When I moved to Asheville, NC after retiring from the Air Force, I noticed that there were very few people of color in Asheville.  After working only a few days in my former government agency, I realized there was a serious problem going on and it had been going on for a long time.  It was time to address the matter and to educate others so they could make cultivated decisions about their careers.

Nepotism, which is the illegal hiring of family and friends in the government has been ignored by many and actually celebrated by those who are benefitting from it.  When you have unlawful hiring of family and friends, the moral in the workplace goes down and you see “qualified” people working in the lowest grades in the federal government and “unqualified” people getting hired and promoted in the federal government. Then add in the fact that racial discrimination also plays an important part of why there are so many “people of color” who are suffering from financial drawbacks to not being hired or promoted in my hometown.  You can learn more about racial discrimination at www.EEOC.gov

When I worked in the second largest federal government agency, I noticed that there were only five black employees out of about 550 employees.  I listened to my “white” management brag about hiring their family and friends.  It was disgusting to me as employees would secretly talk to me about the matter because they knew I had worked in Human Resources for over 22 years at the time.  You are probably wondering—yes—I did report it to the Office of Special Counsel in Washington D.C.

Photo Courtesy of Images.google.com, with permission to reuse this picture

Many of these employees had many years of experience and education that should have supported them in receiving a job offer or a promotion if they were already hired in the agency.  But, no, they were being deprived of having a fair opportunity, while unqualified people were hired and promoted because they were friends and family members of management. How do federal supervisors and manager get away with nepotism and racial discrimination?  I will share three ways that can happen.

First, if a federal supervisor/manager wants to hire a “certain person”, they can write a position description (PD) that would “eliminate” other potential people from being qualified.  The PD is written where only this person or very few people are qualified for a job posting.  This is called a prohibited personnel practice (PPP) and it grants the “targeted individual hire” an illegal and unfair disadvantage.  You can research nepotism restrictions in your state at http://www.ncsl.org/research/ethics/50-state-table-nepotism-restrictions.aspx.

Second, only certain federal employees receive training that can later support them receiving a promotion that requires the training they attended, while other employees may be denied this beneficial training. This is also a prohibited personnel practice that is illegal and reportable to the Office of Special Counsel that investigates valid prohibited personnel practices.  You can contact them here:  https://osc.gov

Third, if you are working in a federal agency and you are interviewed for a promotion opportunity, you may be “downgraded” in your skills or capabilities.  For example, when I applied for a supervisor position, I later found out that my supervisor experience was down-graded as if I had never been a supervisor and had no experience as a supervisor.  I had many years of experience as a supervisor and manager.  I found out my “low” supervisory scores I received during my in-house interview when I received access to view my scores and everyone else’s scores that applied for the promotion, through the Freedom of Information Act (FOIA).  You can learn more about accessing FOIA (federal) records here:  https://www.foia.gov/report-makerequest.html

If you are concerned that you were not hired due to nepotism or because of your race, be sure to reach out to the resources I provided in this article.  It is illegal to receive retaliation for being a “whistleblower”.  Yes—retaliation does happen, but if you ignore a serious problem, it does not go away—it lingers.  If you receive any kind of reprisal for filing charges of nepotism, prohibited personnel practices or discrimination based on unfair treatment because of your race, color, religion, sex (including pregnancy, gender identity, and sexual orientation), national origin, age (40 or older), disability or genetic information, be sure to contact the agency you filed the charges with and submit the “alleged retaliation” charges within the required time-frame required for each agency.  Most reprisals have to be submitted within 45 calendar days of the retaliation action.

If you are looking for resources on workplace bullying or discrimination you can find many answers here:  http://www.fspagainstbullying.org/workplace-bullying.html

Every Wednesday, you can watch a new video (1 -3 mins) I put out weekly, that addresses workplace bullying and discrimination solutions.  Be sure to “like” our business page: https://www.facebook.com/FiftyShadesOfPurpleAgainstBullying/   so you can get notifications of new videos and other valuable information.

Join our Facebook group, https://www.facebook.com/groups/1752823468278515/ so you can get the support and guidance needed if you or another person is experiencing harassment or discrimination in the workplace.

Stay empowered and drop me a line if you found this article to be helpful at http://www.workplacebullyingsupport.com/contact/

 

 

How to Find Strength When You are Being Abused

Dawn and the TreeHave you ever noticed a newly planted tree that has been staked by a landscaper?  You may think that the stakes will support the tree in the event of heavy winds.  In most cases, the newly planted trees do not need to be staked.  It’s an unnecessary “extra” step that some landscapers perform.  Unless the tree is super “top heavy”, most newly planted trees do not need staking.  Why?

Trees have a hormone called “auxin”, which helps play a key role in the direction of a plants growth. When a plant is staked, it can affect the caliper and taper of a plant—basically it can affect the tree’s growth.    Where am I going with this?  I like to compare “growth” of humans and trees because both share one thing—strength through adversity.  I am also a horticulturist and love plants/people.

When the winds blow the trees around, the trees are busy producing Auxin hormones to help it become stronger.  As humans, you can also become stronger if you look at your negative experiences and conquer the “lessons”.    Discern on the “gift” each lesson gave you.  Do you need to love yourself more?  Show yourself more respect? Set healthier boundaries in your life?

You become more empowered when you see the negative “patterns” in your life that are repeating themselves over and over.  Perhaps you are attracting more people in your life that treat you badly or you always make bad decisions.  Most scientists and others will tell you that everything is “energy”.   Like energy attracts “like” energy.  Pay attention to the thoughts in your head.  Up to 90% of your belief system is in your subconscious.  You may have learned to give and give to others (with no boundaries) until it hurt, from a parent.  Perhaps you were told you would not amount to anything in life because a parent was using “reverse psychology” to motivate you.

Without realizing it, today, you are attracting “patterns” of lessons you need to master for your own growth.  Yes—they can be very painful.  Who wants to be mistreated?  No one.  It’s up to you to take 100% responsibility for your life.  When you take responsibility to get the help you need—your life can change for the better.  Let me share a story with you.  I was in a long-term alcoholic relationship 20 years ago.  I went to an open AA meeting for help and noticed everyone was very happy and smiling.  But, I felt broken and could not handle all the emotions in this small room.  I quickly ran out and ended up in a large cleaning closet in this building.  Closing the closet door behind me, I was mortified and began crying.

First, I could not escape the “happy” people and second, I was in a cleaning closet for crying out loud!  I heard the message, “you belong in that meeting room” and I slowly walked back in that room for the moral support I needed.  Everyone pretended they did not see me in the cleaning closet.   I realized I had a long way to go to help myself become healthier and whole again.  I had become “sicker” than the narcissistic alcoholic and needed help.

I was dealing with a narcissistic alcoholic in my life who nearly killed me in his “blackouts”.  I had fought him off me many times and I knew he would kill me if I did not get help.  He was very strong and it took all my energy to fight him off me.  He was in denial.   I was truly “sick” and it was affecting the quality of my life.  Working 12 – 14 hours daily was my escape from this madness.  I became a big “overachiever” in the Air Force.  It was my escape.

After the open AA meeting, one of the scruffiest men I had ever met in my life, asked me to follow him to his house to meet his wife.  There was something about that man that made me trust him.  I followed behind his old beaten up car.  Suspecting we were about to arrive at a trailer park, I mentally told myself it would be alright.  The house I arrived at was a multi-million dollar home at Mexico Beach in North Florida.  I put my hands over my face in disgrace and embarrassment again.  I had gotten another good lesson in one evening.  Never judge a book by its cover. This man was not only very wise—he was very wealthy too.

This beautiful home was the house I passed every day while walking on the beach.  I had found solitude and grounding in walking in the sand and breathing the salt air.

Well, the scruffy man who came to my rescue was a retired Army helicopter pilot and his wife was an accomplished author.  Lessons!  I tell you.  When you ask for help, whether through praying or with intention, you will get what you need, but not always how you expect it to come.

I only had a few months with this man and the open AA group as I was in the Air Force and about to transfer to the Black Hills in South Dakota.   I was open to helping myself and it came in a peculiar way.  Be open to getting the help you deserve.  Take 100% accountability in becoming healthier and happier in your life.  Claim your personal power by breaking the patterns of negativity in your life.  Slow down and listen to your “inner knowing” that is telling you he or she is not the “right one”.  Trust the gut-feeling that you should walk away from a situation that will dis-empower you. Say “no” to narcissistic people and keep walking to a more healthy and empowered life.  Get professional help if you need it.  You will find a way to afford it or you can reach out to www.211.org, which is a United Way program that offers many resources in each state that can support you on your journey.  You deserve to healthy and happy!

If you need consulting or coaching to support you becoming healthier and more empowered–reach out to me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Prozac or a Life Coach?

Dawn at her birthday party!If you had the choice, would you choose to take Prozac for “mild” depression or would you hire a Life Coach?  According to the World Health Organization (WHO), 350 million people worldwide suffer from depression. It is a leading cause of disability.  When it comes to what creates depression, you may want to consider the benefits of Prozac or any other mind-altering pharmaceutical or what paybacks you will get from working with a Life Coach.

It’s important to listen to your doctor and follow sage advice.  If you are dealing with depression—you may need pharmaceutical medicine to manage your depression. It may help you to find “stability” in your life or to find a way to cope with your depression. But—what if you could see how you have created your depression through hiring a Life Coach?  Sometimes you need another person to show you how you have become your own “worst bully” in your life.

For example, if you allow others to mistreat your or disrespect you, this could be causing you to have depression.  Working with a Life Coach who is well-suited to support your needs and goals can help you to “break” some habits that aren’t for you highest good.  See my blog on hiring the right Life coach:  http://dawnmariewestmoreland.com/2015/09/27/five-tips-before-hiring-a-life-coach/

If you have allowed yourself to be bullied by others, your self-esteem and self-love may be at an all-time low.  No one wants to be bullied.  It’s plain awful.   Often times, bullies target people who they feel are weak and easy to bully.   The harm—mental and physical can put you in a state of mind that is hard to overcome.  Every person feels their story is powerful to them.  Their perception is real to them.

One out of four women has been sexually molested, while one out of six men has experienced this also according to “Our Voice”, which is a non-profit organization in Asheville, NC that serves sexual assault abuse through counseling, advocacy, and education.  If you have experienced sexual abuse and have not been able to heal from it, you may be feeling insecure, have low self-esteem or self-love.   You may not mix well with others or you tend to be quieter than others.  Workplace bullies pick up on these tendencies and prey on those who they think are weak.

What if you could learn to love and respect yourself?  Chances are that you would have “healthier boundaries” with others.  You may learn how to be an “observer”, instead of an “absorber” when you deal with narcissistic bullies in the workplace.  Learning how to be a non-player in other people’s drama is very empowering and liberating.  Sometimes the greatest teachers are the narcissistic bully.

You can learn how to stand up to workplace bullying and you can find that with the right Life Coach. You will never find it by taking Prozac.  Now, don’t get me wrong—there is no “shame” in taking care of yourself and being on medication if you really need it.  Please make sound decisions when dealing with your health and well-being.  Listen to your doctor.

However, if you don’t learn how to set healthy boundaries in your life and to truly love yourself, you will probably be dealing with negative circumstances, over and over in your life.  It’s time to set yourself free from your “old stories”.  It’s time to own your “stories”, instead of your stories “owning” you.   Consider working with a Life Coach and learn how you can break your “chains” of dis-empowerment and live a better life.

Many Life Coaches have been in your “shoes” before and that is why they are attracted to helping others who have similar circumstances as they have in their life.   Some Life Coaches have worked on themselves and improved their own self-development before reaching out to help others.  There is nothing like being stuck in the “mud” and then overcoming the circumstances.

If you can learn how to become empowered, it’s like being taught how to fish.  Instead of someone giving you fish to eat, you learn to catch your own fish.  You become independent and trust yourself.  You get the point.  Claiming your personal power means holding yourself accountable to make wiser decisions and to get the help you deserve.  Many of the famous spiritual leaders in our world have gone through massive “transformations” to become who they are today.  They have been badly abused, they have overcome, and today, they are teaching others how to overcome.

In wrapping up, discern on which side of empowerment you want to be on—the side that keeps you weak and unhappy or the side that allows you to be the greatest version of you?  I hope you choose happiness and being empowered because you deserve it.

If you want more tips on standing up to workplace bullying and empowerment, check out www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com and be sure to follow Dawn Marie Westmoreland on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/HealingThymeSvcs You will learn how Dawn became a successful government “whistleblower” through her story and how she is helping to empower others to stand up to workplace bullying as a national speaker, author, coach and HR consultant.

How Strong is the Soul After Workplace Bullying?

Dawn in Mar 2012--Two weeks after getting out of the Mental Health ward

Sometimes we are unaware how strong and powerful we are on this earth. The picture of me looking exhausted and dis-empowered was taken two weeks after passing out in my workplace due to the stress of two years of workplace bullying.  My skin really was yellow back then and I had purple discoloration under my eyes at the time of this picture.  I ended up being taken to the Charles George VA Medical Center for treatment from the Midatlantic Consolidated Patient Accounting Center (MACPAC), which is the “revenue” agency within the Veteran Affairs. I had reported numerous managers for nepotism (illegal hiring of family and friends in the government by management) and other prohibited personnel matters. My management did everything they could to “break” me and to get me to quit my job, but I was determined to hold them accountable, which I did in March 2014. It was an “emotional victory” when I was able to refuse signing a “gag order” settlement that would keep me quiet and unable to share my story to help others who deal with workplace bullying.

Memories of all the “tactics” used to harm me, actually “liberated” me. If you are being bullied in the workplace, you also can become “liberated” too. I look back at all the false charges placed upon my character as I was on Administrative Leave for about 100 days, the wrongful denial of being given a medical Reasonable Accommodation as a severely disabled veteran, the hateful looks, and the denial of promotions, while management’s friends rose in their own promotion system, which was illegal. Reflecting back, I remember the man who called me on December 23, 2014 and told me he wanted to hire my healing services, but wanted no records and he would pay with cash. He asked me if I worked with gay people. That made me highly suspicious of this being a deceitful natured call. Who calls someone and asks if they work with “gay people”? I knew my Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) hearing was coming up in a couple of months and my “gut” was telling me that this call was not from a honest man. The entire call sounded like a “script” being read. Highly suspicious!

“Red flags” were coming up for me and I felt that this was no ordinary call. When I accepted the call and answered it, I had noticed it was from a “restricted’ caller, which denied me their phone number on my caller identification. While I listened to him, my intuition was also providing me with “insight” that this was not a normal call and he was up to something “shady”. I could even hear machinery in the background, which was common while I was waiting for my Equal Employment Opportunity hearing with the Administrative judge. I felt like the call was a “trap” of some kind and politely told the man that I did not feel that we were a good “fit” to work together and ended the call. Later 30 pages of my Facebook posts were entered into the “discovery” phase of the EEO process. All of my posts were positive and inspirational, which baffled my attorney and I. It appeared to me that desperate attempts were made to find something derogatory on me. That never happened. I had done no wrong.

When you deal with workplace bullying, you may experience a little or a lot of bullying. It really does not matter how much harm you receive–it’s how you perceive your own situation. Your thoughts form your belief system. Isn’t it time to evaluate if your belief system is supporting you for your highest good? Maybe it’s time to take a deep breath, and allow that breath to slowly be released, along with releasing old thought patterns that are keeping you trapped and small in your life.

You may be wondering how you can become liberated from workplace bullying. If you are a sensitive person, you may have a harder time working with aggressive workplace bullies. They sense that you are a “nice person” and according to statistics with the Workplace Bullying Institute, up to 37% of the people who are bullied in the workplace are targeted because they are compassionate and kind people. Often times, bullies perceive you as a “weak” person or an “easy target” to harass. Sometimes our “gifts” in our life come in ugly wrapping paper. The lesson or “gift” you may get out of bullying can help you to find comfort, healing, and owning your “personal power”. Let me explain. For me–I had to realize that the biggest bully was myself for thinking I was a “victim” during this time. That lesson propelled me forward to work on my own personal issues and become “free” from my past dis-empowerment. You may find that you get the “gift” of learning you need to set healthy boundaries in your life with all people or you may discover you need to work on having more self love and self respect. This give you the opportunity to discern on ways to “liberate” yourself and become happier in your life.

No matter how bad your situation is around workplace bullying, there is always an option you may never have thought about or an action you should take on your behalf. Keeping good records is always important. You can learn more about the importance and how to document at  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1ZrLOMccHg  Once you “liberate” yourself and stand in your power, you may move onto a better job where you are treated with respect or you may become an entrepreneur like myself. What ever you do–live your soul’s purpose with great joy!

p.s.  If you would like a complimentary 20 minute strategy session with me about workplace bullying.  Reach out and contact me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Dawn empowered on the bridge

What Government Employee Bullies Don’t Want You to Know

Dawn sitting on a rock in black and white

 

 

 

 

Let’s face it, depending on whose statistics you use, government workplace bullying is on the rise.  According to http://www.forbes.com/sites/naomishavin/2014/06/25/what-work-place-bullying-looks-like-in-2014-and-how-to-intervene/ “96% of American employees experience bullying in the workplace, and the nature of that bullying is changing”.   Workplace bullying creates a hostile workplace that is devoid of a safe and respectful work environment.  Bullied employees can hardly put out their best work when they are under so much stress. Then they may face disciplinary action because they are not working up to mandated work standards.  Talk about stress and feeling like a ‘victim’!  Holding government workplace bullies accountable can be hard, but I can make it a little easier for you. Let me share five tips for dealing with workplace bullying so you employ these tips and have a better outcome.

The first tip is to document your workplace bullying.  I created a video that explains it further at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1ZrLOMccHg  This video explains the importance of why and how you should document workplace bullying.  I was able to ‘settle’ with the Veteran Affairs (VA) in March 2014 because I had ‘solid” documentation that supported my case of retaliation for being a VA “Whistleblower”.  Two days before my Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) hearing, the VA attorneys were willing to ‘settle’ with me.  I won an emotional victory as I can now write and talk about my own bullying story to help others because I refused to sign a “gag-order” that would keep me from sharing my story.

Second, be mindful that most government Human Resource departments are part of management.  If you are being bullied by management, you are also addressing your bullying situation with your management.  This is not necessarily a bad thing, but you should be aware of your organization’s structure.  Every government agency is required to have information on their bulletin boards such as job safety/health, Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA), and Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) information, etc., that comply with government requirements.  Here is more information on Equal Employment Opportunity rights:  http://www.dol.gov/ofccp/regs/compliance/posters/pdf/eeopost.pdf  Be aware of your rights and who to contact if they are being violated.  For example, if you file a discrimination report with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) for race, color, religion, sex, national origin, disability, age, sex or genetics, you must file within 45 days of the occurrence or the claim may not be accepted.

Third, federal laws prohibit covered entities from retaliating against a person who files a charge of discrimination, participates in a discrimination proceeding, or otherwise opposes an unlawful employment practice.  If you have filed an EEO case or have submitted prohibited personnel information to the Office of Special Counsel (OSC) and receive retaliation from your workplace, you are entitled to report the alleged allegations within 45 days for retaliation of you filing a grievance. Often times, the retaliation case may be combined with your initial reported case, for ease of processing and time guidelines. Be sure to report each occurrence of retaliation within 45 days or it may not be accepted.  Note:  Winning a discrimination case can be tough, however, if you are retaliated against and have good evidence or documentation, you may end up winning or settling on your ‘retaliation’ case because you are in a ‘protected status’ for filing your claim.

Fourth, often times there is very little disciplinary action done against government perpetrators. For example, the Concerned Veterans for America (CVA) has taken action to employ accountability in the Veteran Affairs and a new law was passed according to http://cv4a.org/cva-applauds-house-passage-va-accountability-act/ however, there does not seem to be a lot of accountability in regards to removing employees who meet disciplinary action mandates.   If you decide to ‘settle’ with the government agency you work in, you may consider not signing a “gag order” that keeps you legally from discussing your case with others. Who knows—you may want to write a book or share your story to help others who deal with government workplace bullying. If you have kept great documentation records, you may want to hold your ‘ground’ and refuse to sign a ‘gag order’ settlement agreement that most government attorneys will want you to sign.  Remember—it’s negotiable, but you must have the courage, documentation, and the willpower to demand it.

Fifth, workplace bullying takes a toll on your mental and physical health.   You must find balance, peace, and positive distractions so that you can stand up to your bullies, demand your entitled rights, and own your personal power.  It’s imperative to find a modality that helps you manage your stress.  You may find great relaxation with yoga, deep breathing exercises, meditation or another modality that resonates with you.  Also, learning how to empower yourself is one of the best ways to step up and own your ‘personal power’.  Find a coach, mentor, clergy member or someone that can help you to find your own confidence and empowerment that is within you.  Claiming your ‘personal power’ and becoming empowered is the greatest revenge of all when it comes to workplace bullying in the government.

P.S.  Did you know you can request a complimentary 20 minute “find your voice/strength here:  Get Advice or Coaching  As an anti-bullying speaker, author, coach, and HR consultant, I am able to help others stand up to workplace bullying.

 

The Formula for Recovering From Workplace Bullying

dawns-book-cover

You hear about it and read about it in the media, all the time. Workplace bullying is increasing according to who is keeping statistics. It’s a known fact that the damage to the ‘victim’ is harmful and creates many hardships for the ‘bullied’ and their loved ones. When I became a Veteran Affairs (VA) Whistle-blower, I alleged nepotism (illegal hiring of family and friends) and other prohibited personnel practices. I turned in numerous personnel and was retaliated for my actions. I was put on administrative leave for about 100 days, denied the right to seek medical care as a severely disabled veteran, I landed in the Mental Health ward after two years of horrific bullying, and my paycheck was cut-off when I refused to go back to a hostile work environment. This created a financial hardship and my whole economic portrait was much compromised. The life I knew was changed in a short time.  I also experienced having poor credit to boot because I could not afford my large house that I had worked so hard for and cherished.

Losing my old ‘self” was the greatest thing that has happened to me. Back in those days, I “bought into” the victim role. I felt very unsafe and insecure with myself.  These days, I often pass the road that would take me to my former job location. I smile each time and then I say ‘thank you” to the bullies who tried to break me and destroy my reputation.   For if it was not for my former bullies, I may not be as liberated as I am today.   My bullies were awesome teachers! I had to work on myself to get this far with my ‘liberation’. I have deep gratification for my workplace bullying experience. Sometimes our ‘gifts’ come in ugly wrapping paper. That’s exactly what happed in my case. Let me share three tips of how I claimed my ‘personal power’.

First, you get to decide if you are going to be a ‘victim’ of your workplace bullying. You may never get the results you think you want from workplace bullying, but you may get what you need to be happier. For example, if you end up leaving the job, you may find a more respectful position or even strive to be an entrepreneur. I have never been happier to work for myself and I love my boss! Sometimes it seems scary to leave a job you are comfortable with and have known for years. When you are striving to do your soul’s purpose on this earth, you may get an uncomfortable nudge to move forward and get in alignment with the work you should be doing–the work you love and can’t wait to do because it feels so ‘alive’.

Second, look at your experience as a lesson. What did you learn from it? Did you learn that you need to have more confidence or standup for your rights? Was the job or the position a ‘bad fit’? Perhaps you learned that you need to value yourself more and work in a job that is better suited for you. There are always lessons in each of our experiences. I believe we get to learn some great lessons from our bullies. They can teach us so much about ourselves and what we need to do to have a better life. Yes—they may make you anxious and depressed with their actions, but you can decide to not be a ‘victim’ and take all the appropriate action you need to stand up to them, leave the work place or find a solution that makes you happier.  Maybe you learned that you needed to learn how to get empowered and stop relying on unnecessary anti-anxiety or anti-depressant pills. NOTE: Always follow your doctor’s advice on medical care.

Third, bullying can take a serious toll on your confidence and self-esteem. You have to understand that you must believe in yourself more than others believe in you. No one can breathe confidence in you. There are many modalities out there that will help you find peace, confidence, and help you to find your own intuitive ‘gifts’.   You may find that exercising, receiving energy work, reading self-help books, taking empowerment courses or seeking reputable help from a coach, counselor or clergy member to be highly beneficial in helping you to heal. This will take some time, but it is so worth it! When you conscientiously invest in your own well-being, you will get results. I wrote a blog, “Five Tips Before Hiring a Life Coach” at Five Tips to Hire the Right Life Coach   Invest in yourself and also be gentle on yourself. Sometimes our worst bullies can be ourselves if we ‘beat up’ on ourselves. Another thing—if you are spending money on things that don’t empower you, that can back fire on you.   I know of a lady that spends endless money on clothes, trips and fun things that she enjoys. While there is nothing wrong with this, she complains she has no money to hire a coach/consultant for her own workplace bullying case. Hmmmmmm! Do you think her priorities are good ones or could she re-think her priorities? It’s sad, because she is being bullied for blowing the ‘whistle’ on her workplace, but could really benefit from an HR consultant or a coach that deals with workplace bullying. You always get to decide and make choices in your life. You must decide wisely or it may backfire on you.

If you need some help or advice, I have 22 years of Human Resources experience, a Masters in Management/Human Resources, I am retired from the United States Air Force, and I am regularly featured on the radio or in magazines for tips on overcoming ‘dis-empowerment’ and ‘workplace bullying’. Today, I am an anti-bullying speaker, personal power coach, author (Empowered Whistleblower: A Practical and Spiritual Path to Personal Power”, and an HR consultant.  I ‘settled’ with the Veteran Affairs in March 2014 and without a “gag-order” to keep me quiet and sharing my story to help others.  It bring me great pleasure to help empower people.  You can find out more about me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

“The Leadership of Energy”

While I was attending training to become a coach with the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC), I learned from their coaching program that there are seven levels of energy. You can learn more about iPEC at www.ipeccoaching.com  The founder of this wonderful coaching school is Dr. Bruce D. Schneider.  Let’s talk about energy.  Everything is energy—our clothes, our cars, and even our personal thoughts.  There are also two types of energy:  anabolic and catabolic.   Anabolic energy is healing, productive, positive, and growth-oriented. While catabolic energy is contracting, draining, and resistant.   If you feel like a “victim’ or feel “hopeless”, that is catabolic energy.  While you feel like a victim, you perception may be distorted and affect the choices that you make.   If you are non-judgmental and feel passionate about your life, you may be at the high-end of the energy levels.

If you feel fear, guilt, worry, self-doubt or have low self-esteem, you will be operating at the lowest level of energy and feel like a “victim”.  Feeling this low, makes you susceptible to feeling helpless and avoiding confrontation.  You may feel like you are “losing”.  This is a highly destructive energy level.  You may notice that you are attracting other “victim-like” people in your life because “like” attracts “like”.   But you don’t have to be a “victim” or feel like you don’t have choices in your life. You can raise your energy levels by becoming more “empowered”.

As you move up the energy levels, you may experience what is known as level two energy.  This is where a person may want to manage others by force or control.   A person may want to project blame on others.  It’s an “I win and you lose” situation in this energy level.  It is certainly better than being a victim, but it’s still catabolic energy that is draining you.  Do you really want to have level two energy?

Level three energy is an entry-level of anabolic energy, which is productive energy and more uplifting.  A person may take responsibilities for their thoughts, actions, and emotions.  They realize they have a choice in the matter and take accountability for this state of being.  This is an “I win, and hopefully you win, too” energy.  A person can motivate themselves and others through forgiving others, being more tolerant, and compromising with others.

When you have a level four energy, you take little or nothing personally and are able to be more objective.  There is more of a “You win” going on and a “service” before self-mentality.  This kind of energy lends to compassion for others and inspiration to serve others.  This fosters team work, loyalty, and collaboration with others.   It is definitely a high level of energy that lends to you becoming more successful and making a difference in this world.

Some of the greatest leaders in this world have a level five energy, which is a “We all win or no one wins” mentality.   The people who possess this energy tend to be calm, confident entrepreneurial, and powerful.  There is a sense of being in control of your life and destiny.   There are no challenges, but every experience in life is an opportunity for self-growth.  One of the core thoughts is that a person is “accepting” of others and does not try to change them.

Level six energy is an energy where a person sees everyone and everything as an extension of themselves.   Their intuition is very active and people possessing this energy can tap into being a creative geniuses and they are visionaries, along with being a conscious leader.   The mentality is “We always win”.  The feeling are of permanent joy, satisfaction and pleasure.  There is a great sense of connection with everything and everyone.

The highest level of energy is one that is characterized by complete objective thinking, being fearless, and are non-judgmental.   A person with this kind of energy can view things with complete objectivity.  The mentality for this energy level is “Winning and losing are illusions”.  It is hard to imagine that concept, but with practice you can achieve it.   Leaders who possess this energy are “masters” in their world and consciously co-create their life experiences.   These are the most powerful leaders in the world.

There are always advantages and disadvantages of each energy level.  Everyone can experience level one energy (Catabolic energy aka “victimhood”) at times and also experience level four energy (Anabolic/where you take nothing personal) too.   Your overall average of your energy levels can dictate how successful you are in your personal life and in your business.  Generally, the higher your energy levels, the more satisfied you are in your relationships, finances, personal self-growth, and your achievements.

It is great to have an awareness of who you are, you level of “consciousness” and how you act in your life.  If you are interested in learning more about the leadership of energy and how to determine where you “fit” in with these energy levels, you can request more information at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact    Just remember that every experience in our life is not a “challenge”, but an opportunity to grow and learn.  If you can truly accept and embrace that, you are raising your energy leadership.  Here is to an “empowering” 2015 and taking action to realize your dreams and Dawn and Virtuegoals this year!

Feed Your Confidence, Not Your Fear—Tips to empower your confidence

Dawn Picture at RRHow often do you “buy-in” to your fear?  Isn’t it self-defeating and un-empowering? It can be down-right crippling.    If you continually feed your fears, you are going to stay “small” and deal with non-serving beliefs about yourself.  Kick your fears to the curb!  You will always feel some “fear” in your life.  Fear is normal and can actually help empower you to make wise choices in your life.  But, when fear controls your life and holds you hostage—it is time to divorce your fears.  Now you may be thinking that this is not so easy, but let me assure you—you can do it if you want to release your fears.

For example, I talked to a lady recently who felt inspired to be a motivational speaker.  In fact, she was dreaming about it.  Now, your dreams can be a powerful sign for you to take action.  Her fear of standing in front of others and what they would think of her was keeping her from taking the action to fulfill her dream.  This happens to many people and some people can “break-through” it and others need a little assistance.   Did you realize our fears can be a form of “gremlin” that can actually protect us? That’s right! Let me explain.  In the case of this lady, her fear aka “gremlin” was protecting her from being embarrassed in front of others and people finding fault with her.   In reality, this kind of “protection” keeps us small and a “leader in hiding”.   For goodness sakes!  There are people out there that really need you and your services. They are only going to connect and resonate with you.

If you are noticing how your life or your business is unfulfilling or that issues are coming up that are making you uncomfortable, that is probably your sign that you are not where you need to be right now.  It’s time to step up and “break-through” your self-made wall that is keeping you on the side of unhappiness and fulfillment.   Don’t be looking for others to rescue you. They have their own issues to work on.  You empower yourself when you do the work needed to step into the person you want to be on this earth.  Now, let’s kick that door down!  If you only realized you are giving away your personal power when you are constantly seeking answers from others. You are your own “expert” in your journey of life. Why not follow your own inner guidance and trust that you can positively change your life.   Are you ready to kick that door down?

First, realize that living “small” and playing “safe” may have protected you in the past from being embarrassed or dealing with critical people.  Just own it and don’t judge yourself.  It served you in the past.  However, if you are really ready to move on and be more empowered, you must have a “talk” with your fear aka “gremlin” and tell it that it has served you well in the past and has protected you.  You may even feel thankful for the protection it served you.  But, you are ready and willing to spread your wings and get the training you want, join a toastmaster’s organization or speak up for a raise in your job now.  Tell your fears or gremlin “thank you and to hit the road now”, because you feel protected in your knowledge that you are able to move forward and that your inner guidance is now going to empower you.

Second, keep some kind of record so you can later realize how far you have come with your own personal-growth.  Often times people take things for granted and fail to realize that even little baby steps are steps of empowerment and lead you in the right direction on your journey.  I find that the more things you express gratitude for, the more grateful experiences will pop into your life.  This has been proven over and over again.  I could share so many amazing opportunities that have entered my life because I express “gratitude” daily.   The heart puts out more energy than the brain does.  Let your appreciation for your personal self-growth and gratitude come from the heart.   Have fun with it and be creative! Some people will write notes and put it in a jar to read later.  It can be helpful to read when you are having a bad day.

Most people can use a little more “confidence” once in a while.  As a hypnotherapist, I created an MP3 called “confidence” that can be listened to in a comfortable place where you will not be interrupted.  It is a guided meditation/hypnosis session that offers suggestions of relaxation and confidence.  Hypnosis is simply a guided meditation.  When you can access your subconscious through meditation/hypnosis, you are able to use mind over matter, with positive suggestions to help you achieve an outcome you desire.  Be sure that you don’t listen to it while operating any heavy equipment.   Always seek professional medical help if needed, this audio cannot replace medical care that you may need.  Here is to more empowerment and staying on the journey to self-growth, self-love, and self-respect!  You can access the “confidence” audio here:  http://dawnmariewestmoreland.com/confidence-hypnosis/

 

Dawn Westmoreland knows what it’s like to be un-empowered and feeling like a “victim”.  After blowing the whistle on her former government manager, Dawn endured two years of retaliation and bullying that resulted in her landing in a mental health ward for three days.  Dawn checked herself out and promised herself that she would never be a “victim” again and she would help others who wanted to move forward in their lives.  Dawn later settled with this government agency and began training to become a Life Coach that empowers professional women today.  She is sought out by media and has finished over 30 radio/magazine interviews about her journey and how she is empowering women today.  Dawn has begun writing her book about her story and tips for others to overcome their “old stories”.  The Christian Science Monitor also has praised Dawn for her bravery and empowering women today.

Are You Your Own Biggest Bully? Five Tips for “Overcoming”

We are always hearing about how others are bullied. This can happen at work, at home, or just about anywhere. It is a fact and it does exist in our society. However, I believe that often we can become our own worst enemy or bully. You may not even realize that you are your own worst bully. If you are sabotaging yourself by thinking small or living small, you may be your own worst enemy. I often get asked how did I overcome severe bullying and other tragic events in my life. I have dealt with bullying, sexual abuse, and domestic abuse, but it does not own me anymore. I was sick and tired, of being sick and tired and I learned how to overcome all of it.

The first tip I offer is to take 100% accountability in your life. You must rescue yourself and believe in yourself more than others believe in you. Complaining to others about how bad things are in your life does not solve the problem. You must learn how to “own “your story, not your story “own “you. Self-care is vital for you to empower yourself. That means eating right, exercising and filling your life with things that nurture your body and soul. This could be meditation, yoga, walking, reading or any activity that really nourishes you.
The second tip I’ll share with you is to take a look at all the negativity around you. Are you contributing to it? Are the people you surround yourself with positive and nurturing people? If you are around a lot of negativity, that will keep you stuck at the lowest level possible in your life. Think about your thoughts. Are they positive or negative? If they are negative, you will find that attracts other negative people and negative events in your life. This does not mean walking around with the permanent silly smile on your face, but really engaging in conversation and actions that propel you forward in a healthier life.
Third, many successful people get ahead by investing in themselves. For example, I hired a business coach to move ahead. My business coach has a business coach. Her business coach has a business coach and so on and so on. We all believe in ourselves and want to get ahead in a successful way. What can you be doing to invest in yourself at this time? Is it getting more education, training, hire a professional to help you move ahead in your life? Quality does not cost. It pays. Be sure to invest in yourself so you are moving in the right direction of your life.
Fourth, life is about choices. No one has a gun at our heads stating we must stay in a job we hate, to stay in an unhealthy relationship or put up with people treating us badly. Remember you can always consider other options that would be better for you. There are plenty of resources out there that can help anyone. If you stay in an unhealthy job or situation, it is your choice. We have no one to blame, but ourselves if we are not making wise choices for ourselves. Is it really worth your happiness and health to remain in a bad situation? We always have choices in our life. Be careful not to give away your personal power by depending too much on others all the time. There is a time and place for when we need help from others. Be wise and remember all the answers are truly within us. Everyone has an opinion, but only you know what is best for you.  Make the choice to “listen” to your own voice and thoughts.
Fifth, our thoughts form our belief system. Is your thoughts constructive and positive? Are they serving you well and moving you forward in your life? We get to choose our thoughts too. We can also change or shift our thoughts if they are not serving us well. If you find this hard to do, you may find that hypnosis or hypnotherapy or life coaching can help you to overcome bad habits, bad patterns or negativity in your life. Life coaching and hypnotherapy helped me to overcome many of the tragedies in my life. It can help you gain confidence, self-love, self-respect and break through all that is holding you back from moving fast forward, in a happier manner. We all truly deserve this in our life.
Empowerment Speaker

“Break-Free” Agent Dawn Marie Westmoreland shares about “overcoming” your old stories and how to “own” them.

The more you can master the steps, the better you will feel about yourself, your energy levels will increase, and you will notice that you attract like-minded people in your life based on the energy you project. Always ask yourself, “what is the best thing I can be doing for myself at this time?” When you step into your own personal power, you realize that you are no longer bothered by your old story because you now are “owning” your story. Life looks a whole lot better too. Let’s release what does not serve us best and embrace 2015 with everything that serves us well and enhances our lives.

Services

Dawn Westmoreland Consulting, LLC

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For Global Leaders, Executive or Political Teams, Government Administrators, and Managers:

Bullying

For Employers

  • With Dawn’s 27 years of Human Resources expertise, she develops an action plan for prevention or correction of workplace bullying
  • Hire Dawn for your company as a speaker, mentor, or HR consultant on workplace bullying and discrimination
  • Develop a healthy workplace culture and protect your company or agency from unnecessary potential of a lawsuit
  • Guidance to create and maintain civility in your workplace: a cultural assessment, review of employees EEO training, effective documentation training of bullying/discrimination behavior, strategic civil work solutions, reviewing and implementing of effective work performance standards, which can reduce EEO and litigation risks with employees
  • Civility  EEO, and Bystander training for your employees and managers
  • Leadership coaching to achieve a healthy and respectful work environment with on-going review of plans to achieve your corporate values and mission

Mallet of justice!

For Attorneys:

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For Spiritual Leaders and Mental Health Professionals:

  • Subject matter expert (SME) support and strategies to aid your discriminated/bullied clients
  • Continuing Learning Education (CLE) support and education
  • 27 years of experience to assist you as an expert witness on workplace harassment/bullying as a speaker, author, professional coach and HR consultant
  • Skilled subject matter expert guidance and strategies to support your discriminated/bullied clients
  • Speaking engagements on workplace bullying/discrimination and empowerment
  • Training and consulting so that you can support your clients and parishioners

Senior business woman lecturing at Conference.

Speaking Engagements:

Dawn in Red Jacket

Consultation / Coaching / Speaking Pricing

Currently, Dawn speaks on these five keynote topics:

Some Gifts Come in Ugly Wrapping Paper

Break free from your dis-empowerment! This keynote workshop will show you how to unwrap your ‘gifts’, and find your voice, strength, and personal power.

 How to Stand Up to Workplace Bullying and Discrimination

How can you protect yourself from workplace bullying? Dawn’s 27 years of HR experience will shed light on the documentation, resources, and empowerment strategies you need!

Where is Your “Shout”?

Don’t work in a job you hate – review your skills, sharpen your talents, and find the perfect position for you! After this keynote speech, you won’t want to sit silently anymore.

Your Dream Needs a Voice

Do you feel like people walk all over you? In this keynote address, learn how to set healthy boundaries, pursue your dreams, and gain the tools you need to empower your life.

Lessons I Learned from Landing in the Mental Health Ward

No one wants to exhibit “victim” behavior, but what do you do when you feel hopeless, lost, or harmed? Dawn’s experiences shed light on the ways we evaluate the energy we put out into the world, and methods for improving your life with peace using proven strategies.

 


Contact Dawn for a customized price for your needs.

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Why Are There So Many “People of Color” in the Projects?

I used to wonder why so many “people of color” were living in the “Projects” in Asheville NC, which is my hometown. Surely, most of them want to work and live a dignified life like most Americans.  Everyone has their own thoughts, but I am going to share mine. When I moved to Asheville, NC after retiring from the Air Force, I noticed that there were very few people of color in Asheville.  After working only a few days in my former government agency, I realized there was a serious problem going on and it had been going on for a long time.  It was time to address the matter and to educate others so they could make cultivated decisions about their careers.

Nepotism, which is the illegal hiring of family and friends in the government has been ignored by many and actually celebrated by those who are benefitting from it.  When you have unlawful hiring of family and friends, the moral in the workplace goes down and you see “qualified” people working in the lowest grades in the federal government and “unqualified” people getting hired and promoted in the federal government. Then add in the fact that racial discrimination also plays an important part of why there are so many “people of color” who are suffering from financial drawbacks to not being hired or promoted in my hometown.  You can learn more about racial discrimination at www.EEOC.gov

When I worked in the second largest federal government agency, I noticed that there were only five black employees out of about 550 employees.  I listened to my “white” management brag about hiring their family and friends.  It was disgusting to me as employees would secretly talk to me about the matter because they knew I had worked in Human Resources for over 22 years at the time.  You are probably wondering—yes—I did report it to the Office of Special Counsel in Washington D.C.

Photo Courtesy of Images.google.com, with permission to reuse this picture

Many of these employees had many years of experience and education that should have supported them in receiving a job offer or a promotion if they were already hired in the agency.  But, no, they were being deprived of having a fair opportunity, while unqualified people were hired and promoted because they were friends and family members of management. How do federal supervisors and manager get away with nepotism and racial discrimination?  I will share three ways that can happen.

First, if a federal supervisor/manager wants to hire a “certain person”, they can write a position description (PD) that would “eliminate” other potential people from being qualified.  The PD is written where only this person or very few people are qualified for a job posting.  This is called a prohibited personnel practice (PPP) and it grants the “targeted individual hire” an illegal and unfair disadvantage.  You can research nepotism restrictions in your state at http://www.ncsl.org/research/ethics/50-state-table-nepotism-restrictions.aspx.

Second, only certain federal employees receive training that can later support them receiving a promotion that requires the training they attended, while other employees may be denied this beneficial training. This is also a prohibited personnel practice that is illegal and reportable to the Office of Special Counsel that investigates valid prohibited personnel practices.  You can contact them here:  https://osc.gov

Third, if you are working in a federal agency and you are interviewed for a promotion opportunity, you may be “downgraded” in your skills or capabilities.  For example, when I applied for a supervisor position, I later found out that my supervisor experience was down-graded as if I had never been a supervisor and had no experience as a supervisor.  I had many years of experience as a supervisor and manager.  I found out my “low” supervisory scores I received during my in-house interview when I received access to view my scores and everyone else’s scores that applied for the promotion, through the Freedom of Information Act (FOIA).  You can learn more about accessing FOIA (federal) records here:  https://www.foia.gov/report-makerequest.html

If you are concerned that you were not hired due to nepotism or because of your race, be sure to reach out to the resources I provided in this article.  It is illegal to receive retaliation for being a “whistleblower”.  Yes—retaliation does happen, but if you ignore a serious problem, it does not go away—it lingers.  If you receive any kind of reprisal for filing charges of nepotism, prohibited personnel practices or discrimination based on unfair treatment because of your race, color, religion, sex (including pregnancy, gender identity, and sexual orientation), national origin, age (40 or older), disability or genetic information, be sure to contact the agency you filed the charges with and submit the “alleged retaliation” charges within the required time-frame required for each agency.  Most reprisals have to be submitted within 45 calendar days of the retaliation action.

If you are looking for resources on workplace bullying or discrimination you can find many answers here:  http://www.fspagainstbullying.org/workplace-bullying.html

Every Wednesday, you can watch a new video (1 -3 mins) I put out weekly, that addresses workplace bullying and discrimination solutions.  Be sure to “like” our business page: https://www.facebook.com/FiftyShadesOfPurpleAgainstBullying/   so you can get notifications of new videos and other valuable information.

Join our Facebook group, https://www.facebook.com/groups/1752823468278515/ so you can get the support and guidance needed if you or another person is experiencing harassment or discrimination in the workplace.

Stay empowered and drop me a line if you found this article to be helpful at http://www.workplacebullyingsupport.com/contact/

 

 

How to Find Strength When You are Being Abused

Dawn and the TreeHave you ever noticed a newly planted tree that has been staked by a landscaper?  You may think that the stakes will support the tree in the event of heavy winds.  In most cases, the newly planted trees do not need to be staked.  It’s an unnecessary “extra” step that some landscapers perform.  Unless the tree is super “top heavy”, most newly planted trees do not need staking.  Why?

Trees have a hormone called “auxin”, which helps play a key role in the direction of a plants growth. When a plant is staked, it can affect the caliper and taper of a plant—basically it can affect the tree’s growth.    Where am I going with this?  I like to compare “growth” of humans and trees because both share one thing—strength through adversity.  I am also a horticulturist and love plants/people.

When the winds blow the trees around, the trees are busy producing Auxin hormones to help it become stronger.  As humans, you can also become stronger if you look at your negative experiences and conquer the “lessons”.    Discern on the “gift” each lesson gave you.  Do you need to love yourself more?  Show yourself more respect? Set healthier boundaries in your life?

You become more empowered when you see the negative “patterns” in your life that are repeating themselves over and over.  Perhaps you are attracting more people in your life that treat you badly or you always make bad decisions.  Most scientists and others will tell you that everything is “energy”.   Like energy attracts “like” energy.  Pay attention to the thoughts in your head.  Up to 90% of your belief system is in your subconscious.  You may have learned to give and give to others (with no boundaries) until it hurt, from a parent.  Perhaps you were told you would not amount to anything in life because a parent was using “reverse psychology” to motivate you.

Without realizing it, today, you are attracting “patterns” of lessons you need to master for your own growth.  Yes—they can be very painful.  Who wants to be mistreated?  No one.  It’s up to you to take 100% responsibility for your life.  When you take responsibility to get the help you need—your life can change for the better.  Let me share a story with you.  I was in a long-term alcoholic relationship 20 years ago.  I went to an open AA meeting for help and noticed everyone was very happy and smiling.  But, I felt broken and could not handle all the emotions in this small room.  I quickly ran out and ended up in a large cleaning closet in this building.  Closing the closet door behind me, I was mortified and began crying.

First, I could not escape the “happy” people and second, I was in a cleaning closet for crying out loud!  I heard the message, “you belong in that meeting room” and I slowly walked back in that room for the moral support I needed.  Everyone pretended they did not see me in the cleaning closet.   I realized I had a long way to go to help myself become healthier and whole again.  I had become “sicker” than the narcissistic alcoholic and needed help.

I was dealing with a narcissistic alcoholic in my life who nearly killed me in his “blackouts”.  I had fought him off me many times and I knew he would kill me if I did not get help.  He was very strong and it took all my energy to fight him off me.  He was in denial.   I was truly “sick” and it was affecting the quality of my life.  Working 12 – 14 hours daily was my escape from this madness.  I became a big “overachiever” in the Air Force.  It was my escape.

After the open AA meeting, one of the scruffiest men I had ever met in my life, asked me to follow him to his house to meet his wife.  There was something about that man that made me trust him.  I followed behind his old beaten up car.  Suspecting we were about to arrive at a trailer park, I mentally told myself it would be alright.  The house I arrived at was a multi-million dollar home at Mexico Beach in North Florida.  I put my hands over my face in disgrace and embarrassment again.  I had gotten another good lesson in one evening.  Never judge a book by its cover. This man was not only very wise—he was very wealthy too.

This beautiful home was the house I passed every day while walking on the beach.  I had found solitude and grounding in walking in the sand and breathing the salt air.

Well, the scruffy man who came to my rescue was a retired Army helicopter pilot and his wife was an accomplished author.  Lessons!  I tell you.  When you ask for help, whether through praying or with intention, you will get what you need, but not always how you expect it to come.

I only had a few months with this man and the open AA group as I was in the Air Force and about to transfer to the Black Hills in South Dakota.   I was open to helping myself and it came in a peculiar way.  Be open to getting the help you deserve.  Take 100% accountability in becoming healthier and happier in your life.  Claim your personal power by breaking the patterns of negativity in your life.  Slow down and listen to your “inner knowing” that is telling you he or she is not the “right one”.  Trust the gut-feeling that you should walk away from a situation that will dis-empower you. Say “no” to narcissistic people and keep walking to a more healthy and empowered life.  Get professional help if you need it.  You will find a way to afford it or you can reach out to www.211.org, which is a United Way program that offers many resources in each state that can support you on your journey.  You deserve to healthy and happy!

If you need consulting or coaching to support you becoming healthier and more empowered–reach out to me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Prozac or a Life Coach?

Dawn at her birthday party!If you had the choice, would you choose to take Prozac for “mild” depression or would you hire a Life Coach?  According to the World Health Organization (WHO), 350 million people worldwide suffer from depression. It is a leading cause of disability.  When it comes to what creates depression, you may want to consider the benefits of Prozac or any other mind-altering pharmaceutical or what paybacks you will get from working with a Life Coach.

It’s important to listen to your doctor and follow sage advice.  If you are dealing with depression—you may need pharmaceutical medicine to manage your depression. It may help you to find “stability” in your life or to find a way to cope with your depression. But—what if you could see how you have created your depression through hiring a Life Coach?  Sometimes you need another person to show you how you have become your own “worst bully” in your life.

For example, if you allow others to mistreat your or disrespect you, this could be causing you to have depression.  Working with a Life Coach who is well-suited to support your needs and goals can help you to “break” some habits that aren’t for you highest good.  See my blog on hiring the right Life coach:  http://dawnmariewestmoreland.com/2015/09/27/five-tips-before-hiring-a-life-coach/

If you have allowed yourself to be bullied by others, your self-esteem and self-love may be at an all-time low.  No one wants to be bullied.  It’s plain awful.   Often times, bullies target people who they feel are weak and easy to bully.   The harm—mental and physical can put you in a state of mind that is hard to overcome.  Every person feels their story is powerful to them.  Their perception is real to them.

One out of four women has been sexually molested, while one out of six men has experienced this also according to “Our Voice”, which is a non-profit organization in Asheville, NC that serves sexual assault abuse through counseling, advocacy, and education.  If you have experienced sexual abuse and have not been able to heal from it, you may be feeling insecure, have low self-esteem or self-love.   You may not mix well with others or you tend to be quieter than others.  Workplace bullies pick up on these tendencies and prey on those who they think are weak.

What if you could learn to love and respect yourself?  Chances are that you would have “healthier boundaries” with others.  You may learn how to be an “observer”, instead of an “absorber” when you deal with narcissistic bullies in the workplace.  Learning how to be a non-player in other people’s drama is very empowering and liberating.  Sometimes the greatest teachers are the narcissistic bully.

You can learn how to stand up to workplace bullying and you can find that with the right Life Coach. You will never find it by taking Prozac.  Now, don’t get me wrong—there is no “shame” in taking care of yourself and being on medication if you really need it.  Please make sound decisions when dealing with your health and well-being.  Listen to your doctor.

However, if you don’t learn how to set healthy boundaries in your life and to truly love yourself, you will probably be dealing with negative circumstances, over and over in your life.  It’s time to set yourself free from your “old stories”.  It’s time to own your “stories”, instead of your stories “owning” you.   Consider working with a Life Coach and learn how you can break your “chains” of dis-empowerment and live a better life.

Many Life Coaches have been in your “shoes” before and that is why they are attracted to helping others who have similar circumstances as they have in their life.   Some Life Coaches have worked on themselves and improved their own self-development before reaching out to help others.  There is nothing like being stuck in the “mud” and then overcoming the circumstances.

If you can learn how to become empowered, it’s like being taught how to fish.  Instead of someone giving you fish to eat, you learn to catch your own fish.  You become independent and trust yourself.  You get the point.  Claiming your personal power means holding yourself accountable to make wiser decisions and to get the help you deserve.  Many of the famous spiritual leaders in our world have gone through massive “transformations” to become who they are today.  They have been badly abused, they have overcome, and today, they are teaching others how to overcome.

In wrapping up, discern on which side of empowerment you want to be on—the side that keeps you weak and unhappy or the side that allows you to be the greatest version of you?  I hope you choose happiness and being empowered because you deserve it.

If you want more tips on standing up to workplace bullying and empowerment, check out www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com and be sure to follow Dawn Marie Westmoreland on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/HealingThymeSvcs You will learn how Dawn became a successful government “whistleblower” through her story and how she is helping to empower others to stand up to workplace bullying as a national speaker, author, coach and HR consultant.

How Strong is the Soul After Workplace Bullying?

Dawn in Mar 2012--Two weeks after getting out of the Mental Health ward

Sometimes we are unaware how strong and powerful we are on this earth. The picture of me looking exhausted and dis-empowered was taken two weeks after passing out in my workplace due to the stress of two years of workplace bullying.  My skin really was yellow back then and I had purple discoloration under my eyes at the time of this picture.  I ended up being taken to the Charles George VA Medical Center for treatment from the Midatlantic Consolidated Patient Accounting Center (MACPAC), which is the “revenue” agency within the Veteran Affairs. I had reported numerous managers for nepotism (illegal hiring of family and friends in the government by management) and other prohibited personnel matters. My management did everything they could to “break” me and to get me to quit my job, but I was determined to hold them accountable, which I did in March 2014. It was an “emotional victory” when I was able to refuse signing a “gag order” settlement that would keep me quiet and unable to share my story to help others who deal with workplace bullying.

Memories of all the “tactics” used to harm me, actually “liberated” me. If you are being bullied in the workplace, you also can become “liberated” too. I look back at all the false charges placed upon my character as I was on Administrative Leave for about 100 days, the wrongful denial of being given a medical Reasonable Accommodation as a severely disabled veteran, the hateful looks, and the denial of promotions, while management’s friends rose in their own promotion system, which was illegal. Reflecting back, I remember the man who called me on December 23, 2014 and told me he wanted to hire my healing services, but wanted no records and he would pay with cash. He asked me if I worked with gay people. That made me highly suspicious of this being a deceitful natured call. Who calls someone and asks if they work with “gay people”? I knew my Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) hearing was coming up in a couple of months and my “gut” was telling me that this call was not from a honest man. The entire call sounded like a “script” being read. Highly suspicious!

“Red flags” were coming up for me and I felt that this was no ordinary call. When I accepted the call and answered it, I had noticed it was from a “restricted’ caller, which denied me their phone number on my caller identification. While I listened to him, my intuition was also providing me with “insight” that this was not a normal call and he was up to something “shady”. I could even hear machinery in the background, which was common while I was waiting for my Equal Employment Opportunity hearing with the Administrative judge. I felt like the call was a “trap” of some kind and politely told the man that I did not feel that we were a good “fit” to work together and ended the call. Later 30 pages of my Facebook posts were entered into the “discovery” phase of the EEO process. All of my posts were positive and inspirational, which baffled my attorney and I. It appeared to me that desperate attempts were made to find something derogatory on me. That never happened. I had done no wrong.

When you deal with workplace bullying, you may experience a little or a lot of bullying. It really does not matter how much harm you receive–it’s how you perceive your own situation. Your thoughts form your belief system. Isn’t it time to evaluate if your belief system is supporting you for your highest good? Maybe it’s time to take a deep breath, and allow that breath to slowly be released, along with releasing old thought patterns that are keeping you trapped and small in your life.

You may be wondering how you can become liberated from workplace bullying. If you are a sensitive person, you may have a harder time working with aggressive workplace bullies. They sense that you are a “nice person” and according to statistics with the Workplace Bullying Institute, up to 37% of the people who are bullied in the workplace are targeted because they are compassionate and kind people. Often times, bullies perceive you as a “weak” person or an “easy target” to harass. Sometimes our “gifts” in our life come in ugly wrapping paper. The lesson or “gift” you may get out of bullying can help you to find comfort, healing, and owning your “personal power”. Let me explain. For me–I had to realize that the biggest bully was myself for thinking I was a “victim” during this time. That lesson propelled me forward to work on my own personal issues and become “free” from my past dis-empowerment. You may find that you get the “gift” of learning you need to set healthy boundaries in your life with all people or you may discover you need to work on having more self love and self respect. This give you the opportunity to discern on ways to “liberate” yourself and become happier in your life.

No matter how bad your situation is around workplace bullying, there is always an option you may never have thought about or an action you should take on your behalf. Keeping good records is always important. You can learn more about the importance and how to document at  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1ZrLOMccHg  Once you “liberate” yourself and stand in your power, you may move onto a better job where you are treated with respect or you may become an entrepreneur like myself. What ever you do–live your soul’s purpose with great joy!

p.s.  If you would like a complimentary 20 minute strategy session with me about workplace bullying.  Reach out and contact me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Dawn empowered on the bridge

What Government Employee Bullies Don’t Want You to Know

Dawn sitting on a rock in black and white

 

 

 

 

Let’s face it, depending on whose statistics you use, government workplace bullying is on the rise.  According to http://www.forbes.com/sites/naomishavin/2014/06/25/what-work-place-bullying-looks-like-in-2014-and-how-to-intervene/ “96% of American employees experience bullying in the workplace, and the nature of that bullying is changing”.   Workplace bullying creates a hostile workplace that is devoid of a safe and respectful work environment.  Bullied employees can hardly put out their best work when they are under so much stress. Then they may face disciplinary action because they are not working up to mandated work standards.  Talk about stress and feeling like a ‘victim’!  Holding government workplace bullies accountable can be hard, but I can make it a little easier for you. Let me share five tips for dealing with workplace bullying so you employ these tips and have a better outcome.

The first tip is to document your workplace bullying.  I created a video that explains it further at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1ZrLOMccHg  This video explains the importance of why and how you should document workplace bullying.  I was able to ‘settle’ with the Veteran Affairs (VA) in March 2014 because I had ‘solid” documentation that supported my case of retaliation for being a VA “Whistleblower”.  Two days before my Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) hearing, the VA attorneys were willing to ‘settle’ with me.  I won an emotional victory as I can now write and talk about my own bullying story to help others because I refused to sign a “gag-order” that would keep me from sharing my story.

Second, be mindful that most government Human Resource departments are part of management.  If you are being bullied by management, you are also addressing your bullying situation with your management.  This is not necessarily a bad thing, but you should be aware of your organization’s structure.  Every government agency is required to have information on their bulletin boards such as job safety/health, Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA), and Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) information, etc., that comply with government requirements.  Here is more information on Equal Employment Opportunity rights:  http://www.dol.gov/ofccp/regs/compliance/posters/pdf/eeopost.pdf  Be aware of your rights and who to contact if they are being violated.  For example, if you file a discrimination report with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) for race, color, religion, sex, national origin, disability, age, sex or genetics, you must file within 45 days of the occurrence or the claim may not be accepted.

Third, federal laws prohibit covered entities from retaliating against a person who files a charge of discrimination, participates in a discrimination proceeding, or otherwise opposes an unlawful employment practice.  If you have filed an EEO case or have submitted prohibited personnel information to the Office of Special Counsel (OSC) and receive retaliation from your workplace, you are entitled to report the alleged allegations within 45 days for retaliation of you filing a grievance. Often times, the retaliation case may be combined with your initial reported case, for ease of processing and time guidelines. Be sure to report each occurrence of retaliation within 45 days or it may not be accepted.  Note:  Winning a discrimination case can be tough, however, if you are retaliated against and have good evidence or documentation, you may end up winning or settling on your ‘retaliation’ case because you are in a ‘protected status’ for filing your claim.

Fourth, often times there is very little disciplinary action done against government perpetrators. For example, the Concerned Veterans for America (CVA) has taken action to employ accountability in the Veteran Affairs and a new law was passed according to http://cv4a.org/cva-applauds-house-passage-va-accountability-act/ however, there does not seem to be a lot of accountability in regards to removing employees who meet disciplinary action mandates.   If you decide to ‘settle’ with the government agency you work in, you may consider not signing a “gag order” that keeps you legally from discussing your case with others. Who knows—you may want to write a book or share your story to help others who deal with government workplace bullying. If you have kept great documentation records, you may want to hold your ‘ground’ and refuse to sign a ‘gag order’ settlement agreement that most government attorneys will want you to sign.  Remember—it’s negotiable, but you must have the courage, documentation, and the willpower to demand it.

Fifth, workplace bullying takes a toll on your mental and physical health.   You must find balance, peace, and positive distractions so that you can stand up to your bullies, demand your entitled rights, and own your personal power.  It’s imperative to find a modality that helps you manage your stress.  You may find great relaxation with yoga, deep breathing exercises, meditation or another modality that resonates with you.  Also, learning how to empower yourself is one of the best ways to step up and own your ‘personal power’.  Find a coach, mentor, clergy member or someone that can help you to find your own confidence and empowerment that is within you.  Claiming your ‘personal power’ and becoming empowered is the greatest revenge of all when it comes to workplace bullying in the government.

P.S.  Did you know you can request a complimentary 20 minute “find your voice/strength here:  Get Advice or Coaching  As an anti-bullying speaker, author, coach, and HR consultant, I am able to help others stand up to workplace bullying.

 

The Formula for Recovering From Workplace Bullying

dawns-book-cover

You hear about it and read about it in the media, all the time. Workplace bullying is increasing according to who is keeping statistics. It’s a known fact that the damage to the ‘victim’ is harmful and creates many hardships for the ‘bullied’ and their loved ones. When I became a Veteran Affairs (VA) Whistle-blower, I alleged nepotism (illegal hiring of family and friends) and other prohibited personnel practices. I turned in numerous personnel and was retaliated for my actions. I was put on administrative leave for about 100 days, denied the right to seek medical care as a severely disabled veteran, I landed in the Mental Health ward after two years of horrific bullying, and my paycheck was cut-off when I refused to go back to a hostile work environment. This created a financial hardship and my whole economic portrait was much compromised. The life I knew was changed in a short time.  I also experienced having poor credit to boot because I could not afford my large house that I had worked so hard for and cherished.

Losing my old ‘self” was the greatest thing that has happened to me. Back in those days, I “bought into” the victim role. I felt very unsafe and insecure with myself.  These days, I often pass the road that would take me to my former job location. I smile each time and then I say ‘thank you” to the bullies who tried to break me and destroy my reputation.   For if it was not for my former bullies, I may not be as liberated as I am today.   My bullies were awesome teachers! I had to work on myself to get this far with my ‘liberation’. I have deep gratification for my workplace bullying experience. Sometimes our ‘gifts’ come in ugly wrapping paper. That’s exactly what happed in my case. Let me share three tips of how I claimed my ‘personal power’.

First, you get to decide if you are going to be a ‘victim’ of your workplace bullying. You may never get the results you think you want from workplace bullying, but you may get what you need to be happier. For example, if you end up leaving the job, you may find a more respectful position or even strive to be an entrepreneur. I have never been happier to work for myself and I love my boss! Sometimes it seems scary to leave a job you are comfortable with and have known for years. When you are striving to do your soul’s purpose on this earth, you may get an uncomfortable nudge to move forward and get in alignment with the work you should be doing–the work you love and can’t wait to do because it feels so ‘alive’.

Second, look at your experience as a lesson. What did you learn from it? Did you learn that you need to have more confidence or standup for your rights? Was the job or the position a ‘bad fit’? Perhaps you learned that you need to value yourself more and work in a job that is better suited for you. There are always lessons in each of our experiences. I believe we get to learn some great lessons from our bullies. They can teach us so much about ourselves and what we need to do to have a better life. Yes—they may make you anxious and depressed with their actions, but you can decide to not be a ‘victim’ and take all the appropriate action you need to stand up to them, leave the work place or find a solution that makes you happier.  Maybe you learned that you needed to learn how to get empowered and stop relying on unnecessary anti-anxiety or anti-depressant pills. NOTE: Always follow your doctor’s advice on medical care.

Third, bullying can take a serious toll on your confidence and self-esteem. You have to understand that you must believe in yourself more than others believe in you. No one can breathe confidence in you. There are many modalities out there that will help you find peace, confidence, and help you to find your own intuitive ‘gifts’.   You may find that exercising, receiving energy work, reading self-help books, taking empowerment courses or seeking reputable help from a coach, counselor or clergy member to be highly beneficial in helping you to heal. This will take some time, but it is so worth it! When you conscientiously invest in your own well-being, you will get results. I wrote a blog, “Five Tips Before Hiring a Life Coach” at Five Tips to Hire the Right Life Coach   Invest in yourself and also be gentle on yourself. Sometimes our worst bullies can be ourselves if we ‘beat up’ on ourselves. Another thing—if you are spending money on things that don’t empower you, that can back fire on you.   I know of a lady that spends endless money on clothes, trips and fun things that she enjoys. While there is nothing wrong with this, she complains she has no money to hire a coach/consultant for her own workplace bullying case. Hmmmmmm! Do you think her priorities are good ones or could she re-think her priorities? It’s sad, because she is being bullied for blowing the ‘whistle’ on her workplace, but could really benefit from an HR consultant or a coach that deals with workplace bullying. You always get to decide and make choices in your life. You must decide wisely or it may backfire on you.

If you need some help or advice, I have 22 years of Human Resources experience, a Masters in Management/Human Resources, I am retired from the United States Air Force, and I am regularly featured on the radio or in magazines for tips on overcoming ‘dis-empowerment’ and ‘workplace bullying’. Today, I am an anti-bullying speaker, personal power coach, author (Empowered Whistleblower: A Practical and Spiritual Path to Personal Power”, and an HR consultant.  I ‘settled’ with the Veteran Affairs in March 2014 and without a “gag-order” to keep me quiet and sharing my story to help others.  It bring me great pleasure to help empower people.  You can find out more about me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

“The Leadership of Energy”

While I was attending training to become a coach with the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC), I learned from their coaching program that there are seven levels of energy. You can learn more about iPEC at www.ipeccoaching.com  The founder of this wonderful coaching school is Dr. Bruce D. Schneider.  Let’s talk about energy.  Everything is energy—our clothes, our cars, and even our personal thoughts.  There are also two types of energy:  anabolic and catabolic.   Anabolic energy is healing, productive, positive, and growth-oriented. While catabolic energy is contracting, draining, and resistant.   If you feel like a “victim’ or feel “hopeless”, that is catabolic energy.  While you feel like a victim, you perception may be distorted and affect the choices that you make.   If you are non-judgmental and feel passionate about your life, you may be at the high-end of the energy levels.

If you feel fear, guilt, worry, self-doubt or have low self-esteem, you will be operating at the lowest level of energy and feel like a “victim”.  Feeling this low, makes you susceptible to feeling helpless and avoiding confrontation.  You may feel like you are “losing”.  This is a highly destructive energy level.  You may notice that you are attracting other “victim-like” people in your life because “like” attracts “like”.   But you don’t have to be a “victim” or feel like you don’t have choices in your life. You can raise your energy levels by becoming more “empowered”.

As you move up the energy levels, you may experience what is known as level two energy.  This is where a person may want to manage others by force or control.   A person may want to project blame on others.  It’s an “I win and you lose” situation in this energy level.  It is certainly better than being a victim, but it’s still catabolic energy that is draining you.  Do you really want to have level two energy?

Level three energy is an entry-level of anabolic energy, which is productive energy and more uplifting.  A person may take responsibilities for their thoughts, actions, and emotions.  They realize they have a choice in the matter and take accountability for this state of being.  This is an “I win, and hopefully you win, too” energy.  A person can motivate themselves and others through forgiving others, being more tolerant, and compromising with others.

When you have a level four energy, you take little or nothing personally and are able to be more objective.  There is more of a “You win” going on and a “service” before self-mentality.  This kind of energy lends to compassion for others and inspiration to serve others.  This fosters team work, loyalty, and collaboration with others.   It is definitely a high level of energy that lends to you becoming more successful and making a difference in this world.

Some of the greatest leaders in this world have a level five energy, which is a “We all win or no one wins” mentality.   The people who possess this energy tend to be calm, confident entrepreneurial, and powerful.  There is a sense of being in control of your life and destiny.   There are no challenges, but every experience in life is an opportunity for self-growth.  One of the core thoughts is that a person is “accepting” of others and does not try to change them.

Level six energy is an energy where a person sees everyone and everything as an extension of themselves.   Their intuition is very active and people possessing this energy can tap into being a creative geniuses and they are visionaries, along with being a conscious leader.   The mentality is “We always win”.  The feeling are of permanent joy, satisfaction and pleasure.  There is a great sense of connection with everything and everyone.

The highest level of energy is one that is characterized by complete objective thinking, being fearless, and are non-judgmental.   A person with this kind of energy can view things with complete objectivity.  The mentality for this energy level is “Winning and losing are illusions”.  It is hard to imagine that concept, but with practice you can achieve it.   Leaders who possess this energy are “masters” in their world and consciously co-create their life experiences.   These are the most powerful leaders in the world.

There are always advantages and disadvantages of each energy level.  Everyone can experience level one energy (Catabolic energy aka “victimhood”) at times and also experience level four energy (Anabolic/where you take nothing personal) too.   Your overall average of your energy levels can dictate how successful you are in your personal life and in your business.  Generally, the higher your energy levels, the more satisfied you are in your relationships, finances, personal self-growth, and your achievements.

It is great to have an awareness of who you are, you level of “consciousness” and how you act in your life.  If you are interested in learning more about the leadership of energy and how to determine where you “fit” in with these energy levels, you can request more information at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact    Just remember that every experience in our life is not a “challenge”, but an opportunity to grow and learn.  If you can truly accept and embrace that, you are raising your energy leadership.  Here is to an “empowering” 2015 and taking action to realize your dreams and Dawn and Virtuegoals this year!

Feed Your Confidence, Not Your Fear—Tips to empower your confidence

Dawn Picture at RRHow often do you “buy-in” to your fear?  Isn’t it self-defeating and un-empowering? It can be down-right crippling.    If you continually feed your fears, you are going to stay “small” and deal with non-serving beliefs about yourself.  Kick your fears to the curb!  You will always feel some “fear” in your life.  Fear is normal and can actually help empower you to make wise choices in your life.  But, when fear controls your life and holds you hostage—it is time to divorce your fears.  Now you may be thinking that this is not so easy, but let me assure you—you can do it if you want to release your fears.

For example, I talked to a lady recently who felt inspired to be a motivational speaker.  In fact, she was dreaming about it.  Now, your dreams can be a powerful sign for you to take action.  Her fear of standing in front of others and what they would think of her was keeping her from taking the action to fulfill her dream.  This happens to many people and some people can “break-through” it and others need a little assistance.   Did you realize our fears can be a form of “gremlin” that can actually protect us? That’s right! Let me explain.  In the case of this lady, her fear aka “gremlin” was protecting her from being embarrassed in front of others and people finding fault with her.   In reality, this kind of “protection” keeps us small and a “leader in hiding”.   For goodness sakes!  There are people out there that really need you and your services. They are only going to connect and resonate with you.

If you are noticing how your life or your business is unfulfilling or that issues are coming up that are making you uncomfortable, that is probably your sign that you are not where you need to be right now.  It’s time to step up and “break-through” your self-made wall that is keeping you on the side of unhappiness and fulfillment.   Don’t be looking for others to rescue you. They have their own issues to work on.  You empower yourself when you do the work needed to step into the person you want to be on this earth.  Now, let’s kick that door down!  If you only realized you are giving away your personal power when you are constantly seeking answers from others. You are your own “expert” in your journey of life. Why not follow your own inner guidance and trust that you can positively change your life.   Are you ready to kick that door down?

First, realize that living “small” and playing “safe” may have protected you in the past from being embarrassed or dealing with critical people.  Just own it and don’t judge yourself.  It served you in the past.  However, if you are really ready to move on and be more empowered, you must have a “talk” with your fear aka “gremlin” and tell it that it has served you well in the past and has protected you.  You may even feel thankful for the protection it served you.  But, you are ready and willing to spread your wings and get the training you want, join a toastmaster’s organization or speak up for a raise in your job now.  Tell your fears or gremlin “thank you and to hit the road now”, because you feel protected in your knowledge that you are able to move forward and that your inner guidance is now going to empower you.

Second, keep some kind of record so you can later realize how far you have come with your own personal-growth.  Often times people take things for granted and fail to realize that even little baby steps are steps of empowerment and lead you in the right direction on your journey.  I find that the more things you express gratitude for, the more grateful experiences will pop into your life.  This has been proven over and over again.  I could share so many amazing opportunities that have entered my life because I express “gratitude” daily.   The heart puts out more energy than the brain does.  Let your appreciation for your personal self-growth and gratitude come from the heart.   Have fun with it and be creative! Some people will write notes and put it in a jar to read later.  It can be helpful to read when you are having a bad day.

Most people can use a little more “confidence” once in a while.  As a hypnotherapist, I created an MP3 called “confidence” that can be listened to in a comfortable place where you will not be interrupted.  It is a guided meditation/hypnosis session that offers suggestions of relaxation and confidence.  Hypnosis is simply a guided meditation.  When you can access your subconscious through meditation/hypnosis, you are able to use mind over matter, with positive suggestions to help you achieve an outcome you desire.  Be sure that you don’t listen to it while operating any heavy equipment.   Always seek professional medical help if needed, this audio cannot replace medical care that you may need.  Here is to more empowerment and staying on the journey to self-growth, self-love, and self-respect!  You can access the “confidence” audio here:  http://dawnmariewestmoreland.com/confidence-hypnosis/

 

Dawn Westmoreland knows what it’s like to be un-empowered and feeling like a “victim”.  After blowing the whistle on her former government manager, Dawn endured two years of retaliation and bullying that resulted in her landing in a mental health ward for three days.  Dawn checked herself out and promised herself that she would never be a “victim” again and she would help others who wanted to move forward in their lives.  Dawn later settled with this government agency and began training to become a Life Coach that empowers professional women today.  She is sought out by media and has finished over 30 radio/magazine interviews about her journey and how she is empowering women today.  Dawn has begun writing her book about her story and tips for others to overcome their “old stories”.  The Christian Science Monitor also has praised Dawn for her bravery and empowering women today.

Are You Your Own Biggest Bully? Five Tips for “Overcoming”

We are always hearing about how others are bullied. This can happen at work, at home, or just about anywhere. It is a fact and it does exist in our society. However, I believe that often we can become our own worst enemy or bully. You may not even realize that you are your own worst bully. If you are sabotaging yourself by thinking small or living small, you may be your own worst enemy. I often get asked how did I overcome severe bullying and other tragic events in my life. I have dealt with bullying, sexual abuse, and domestic abuse, but it does not own me anymore. I was sick and tired, of being sick and tired and I learned how to overcome all of it.

The first tip I offer is to take 100% accountability in your life. You must rescue yourself and believe in yourself more than others believe in you. Complaining to others about how bad things are in your life does not solve the problem. You must learn how to “own “your story, not your story “own “you. Self-care is vital for you to empower yourself. That means eating right, exercising and filling your life with things that nurture your body and soul. This could be meditation, yoga, walking, reading or any activity that really nourishes you.
The second tip I’ll share with you is to take a look at all the negativity around you. Are you contributing to it? Are the people you surround yourself with positive and nurturing people? If you are around a lot of negativity, that will keep you stuck at the lowest level possible in your life. Think about your thoughts. Are they positive or negative? If they are negative, you will find that attracts other negative people and negative events in your life. This does not mean walking around with the permanent silly smile on your face, but really engaging in conversation and actions that propel you forward in a healthier life.
Third, many successful people get ahead by investing in themselves. For example, I hired a business coach to move ahead. My business coach has a business coach. Her business coach has a business coach and so on and so on. We all believe in ourselves and want to get ahead in a successful way. What can you be doing to invest in yourself at this time? Is it getting more education, training, hire a professional to help you move ahead in your life? Quality does not cost. It pays. Be sure to invest in yourself so you are moving in the right direction of your life.
Fourth, life is about choices. No one has a gun at our heads stating we must stay in a job we hate, to stay in an unhealthy relationship or put up with people treating us badly. Remember you can always consider other options that would be better for you. There are plenty of resources out there that can help anyone. If you stay in an unhealthy job or situation, it is your choice. We have no one to blame, but ourselves if we are not making wise choices for ourselves. Is it really worth your happiness and health to remain in a bad situation? We always have choices in our life. Be careful not to give away your personal power by depending too much on others all the time. There is a time and place for when we need help from others. Be wise and remember all the answers are truly within us. Everyone has an opinion, but only you know what is best for you.  Make the choice to “listen” to your own voice and thoughts.
Fifth, our thoughts form our belief system. Is your thoughts constructive and positive? Are they serving you well and moving you forward in your life? We get to choose our thoughts too. We can also change or shift our thoughts if they are not serving us well. If you find this hard to do, you may find that hypnosis or hypnotherapy or life coaching can help you to overcome bad habits, bad patterns or negativity in your life. Life coaching and hypnotherapy helped me to overcome many of the tragedies in my life. It can help you gain confidence, self-love, self-respect and break through all that is holding you back from moving fast forward, in a happier manner. We all truly deserve this in our life.
Empowerment Speaker

“Break-Free” Agent Dawn Marie Westmoreland shares about “overcoming” your old stories and how to “own” them.

The more you can master the steps, the better you will feel about yourself, your energy levels will increase, and you will notice that you attract like-minded people in your life based on the energy you project. Always ask yourself, “what is the best thing I can be doing for myself at this time?” When you step into your own personal power, you realize that you are no longer bothered by your old story because you now are “owning” your story. Life looks a whole lot better too. Let’s release what does not serve us best and embrace 2015 with everything that serves us well and enhances our lives.

Services

Dawn Westmoreland Consulting, LLC

bullying

For Global Leaders, Executive or Political Teams, Government Administrators, and Managers:

Bullying

For Employers

  • With Dawn’s 27 years of Human Resources expertise, she develops an action plan for prevention or correction of workplace bullying
  • Hire Dawn for your company as a speaker, mentor, or HR consultant on workplace bullying and discrimination
  • Develop a healthy workplace culture and protect your company or agency from unnecessary potential of a lawsuit
  • Guidance to create and maintain civility in your workplace: a cultural assessment, review of employees EEO training, effective documentation training of bullying/discrimination behavior, strategic civil work solutions, reviewing and implementing of effective work performance standards, which can reduce EEO and litigation risks with employees
  • Civility  EEO, and Bystander training for your employees and managers
  • Leadership coaching to achieve a healthy and respectful work environment with on-going review of plans to achieve your corporate values and mission

Mallet of justice!

For Attorneys:

Buddha

For Spiritual Leaders and Mental Health Professionals:

  • Subject matter expert (SME) support and strategies to aid your discriminated/bullied clients
  • Continuing Learning Education (CLE) support and education
  • 27 years of experience to assist you as an expert witness on workplace harassment/bullying as a speaker, author, professional coach and HR consultant
  • Skilled subject matter expert guidance and strategies to support your discriminated/bullied clients
  • Speaking engagements on workplace bullying/discrimination and empowerment
  • Training and consulting so that you can support your clients and parishioners

Senior business woman lecturing at Conference.

Speaking Engagements:

Dawn in Red Jacket

Consultation / Coaching / Speaking Pricing

Currently, Dawn speaks on these five keynote topics:

Some Gifts Come in Ugly Wrapping Paper

Break free from your dis-empowerment! This keynote workshop will show you how to unwrap your ‘gifts’, and find your voice, strength, and personal power.

 How to Stand Up to Workplace Bullying and Discrimination

How can you protect yourself from workplace bullying? Dawn’s 27 years of HR experience will shed light on the documentation, resources, and empowerment strategies you need!

Where is Your “Shout”?

Don’t work in a job you hate – review your skills, sharpen your talents, and find the perfect position for you! After this keynote speech, you won’t want to sit silently anymore.

Your Dream Needs a Voice

Do you feel like people walk all over you? In this keynote address, learn how to set healthy boundaries, pursue your dreams, and gain the tools you need to empower your life.

Lessons I Learned from Landing in the Mental Health Ward

No one wants to exhibit “victim” behavior, but what do you do when you feel hopeless, lost, or harmed? Dawn’s experiences shed light on the ways we evaluate the energy we put out into the world, and methods for improving your life with peace using proven strategies.

 


Contact Dawn for a customized price for your needs.