“Loving the Unlovable”–tips on empowerment

What a title! Can you relate? I sure can! I bet you know of someone in your life that drives you crazy and you would rather avoid them, then deal with their trauma and drama. When this person(s) enters the room, you feel your blood boil, your stomach cramp or you feel nauseous because this person can be very manipulative or narcistic. They may even be an “energy vampire” too, the kind of person that “drains” your energy with their presence and behavior, I have dealt with this experience myself and use to lose a lot of sleep over the raDawn pic for Newlife64ntings and manipulative behavior of a “energy vampire”. This person drove me crazy with rage and disgust because I felt they were continuously taking advantage of a loved one.

I realized that my “clairsentience”, which is intuition in the form of emotional input, gut feeling or physical feeling and my “Claircognizance”, which is when intuitive information just pops into your head, was developing and I had a sense of “knowing” about things and people. It drove me nuts and I wanted others to experience these insights like I did. We all have intuitive gifts. They are different for each person, but we all have intuitive gifts. It’s a matter of accepting these “gifts” and be open to them too. Once you are, be ready for your “gifts”.   These tools are invaluable if used correctly and they can be of great benefit in your personal life and business. I don’t claim to be psychic, but have different levels of intuitive “gifts” and I am grateful for them. I love using my “gifts” to help others.

Getting back to the “unlovable” people in your life. It has taken me many years to realize that these people can be the greatest “spiritual teachers” in your life. I have suffered and anguished over these kinds of people, until I was able to “let go” and trust that there is a reason for “unlovable” people in my life. They can teach you patience, standing up for yourself, and trusting that they are in your life for a “divine” reason. They can bring you closer to God or whatever source you are close to and they can also provide the best lessons in life. The “unlovable” are in your life for a reason—take time to discern over this and realize you have the opportunity of improving your spirituality and personal growth.  You get to choose and life is all about choices. I continually repeat this in most of my blogs.

The “unlovable” can come into your loved ones lives to teach them lessons and even you.   Since “like” attracts “like”, it can bring a narcistic/manipulative person to a person who has low self-esteem and may continually get treated with dis-respect. Once you are able to raise your energy levels and find self-respect, you will notice that the people in your life are “matching” your energy levels and your self-esteem.   That is why it is so important to work on self-development so you can experience the best relationships with others in your life.   Until then, you must set healthy “boundaries” in your life. That simply means that you cannot allow others to dis-respect you and take advantage of you. I love Doreen Virtue’s new book, “Assertiveness for Earth Angels”. I have read this book twice and highly recommend it to others who deal with “unlovable” people. Once you know how to deal with all kinds of people, life gets less messy and uncomplicated. Until you stand up for yourself and show your own self some R.E.S.P.E.C.T., you may find yourself repeating old behaviors that attract the “unlovable” in your life.

Now, I know we cannot pick our family members, but we can choose our friends very wisely. The five people we hang out with the most each day will have a profound effect on you. They will affect you personally, financially, and spiritually. Don’t beat yourself up on past experiences with “unlovable” people. Just learn the “lessons”, become more empowered and never stop growing—spiritually.   The worst people in my life have helped me to get closer to God and improve my own spirituality. Now, that is empowering! The “unlovable” can be loved, but sometimes it may have to be at a distance and with a lot of praying for ease and grace to be in your life.   Just remember they teach you many things in your life. They are not a challenge to you, but an opportunity to learn and grow. So, let it happen!

Who is Your Best Friend?

Dawn smaller pictureIs the reflection in the mirror your best friend or worst ? I hope it is your best friend. There may be times that you think another person may be your enemy, but often times, the worst enemy can be yourself. I know this so well! No one has ever been meaner or mistreated me more than myself. The man who molested me as a child, the bullies in school, the alcoholic that nearly choked me to death, and the bullies who retaliated against me for blowing the whistle in the Veteran Affairs were not my worst enemies—I was my own worst enemy! That’s right.   My past negative thoughts formed a belief system that I was not worthy and I was not deserving. Thank goodness, I can laugh at all my lessons I overcame from my past. Isn’t it time to “own” your old stories, instead of your stories “owning” you?  Hell yeah!

You can purchase the “right” clothes and the “right” car (ok…truck in my case), but underneath it all, you have to love who you are and what you are doing in this world.  If there is pain behind your superficial smile, it’s time to get to work and become an empowered and self-loving individual. Hire a coach and bust through those “blocks” in your life that keep you in fear and insecure.   Don’t tell me you can’t afford a coach, unless you really cannot afford one.   For I will tell you that you cannot afford not to hire a coach if you are miserable or stuck in your life. The cost of living a “small” life or not getting what you want out of your life is very costly.   I saw the value in hiring a business coach and made appropriate changes in my life so that I could afford this investment in my life. You have to consciously invest in yourself and you must believe in yourself, more than others believe in you!

The benefits I received from hiring a  coach was that I began to see why I had made “bad” choices in my life and I was able to “shift” consciously to align with a better belief system. There were quite a few “aha” moments and awareness that I could make better choices in my life. I took immediate action and “shifted” my life very quickly. The investment in myself, not only improved my practice, but it positively affected my spiritual and personal life.   A coach can really help a client see what has been holding them back in their business and personal life.

Furthermore, a coach can help the client formulate a plan of action so that they are in alignment with reaching their goals and dreams.  Often times, all you need is a change of view on your belief systems. If you are doing the same thing, over and over, and not getting the results you want—it’s time to do something different. Don’t you think? When I overcame my own old “stories” and claimed my personal power that is when people really noticed me and many new “doors” opened for me. There is so much goodness in this world and it’s time to realize it! Sound good? I would love seeing a lot of happy people on this earth. What a win-win! Bring it on!

I would love to help you realize your goals and “bust” through the walls that have confined you and have made you a prisoner of yourself.   I help clients by phone, Skype, Google Hangouts or in person.  First time clients can receive a $40.00 (45 minute) “break-though” to success strategy with me by contacting me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact   By the way, be sure to be part of my newsletter community. I will be sending a complimentary copy of my first chapter in my book to everyone on my newsletter mail list. Join here: Dawn’s Newsletter

I will be sharing my own “story” of gloom and doom and how I “divorced” my victimhood. Today, I speak, write, “coach”, and get interviewed on radio/TV for the work I am doing to empower people. I am teaching workshops to help others become happier and liberated in their lives.   I can also be reached to discuss interviews, workshops, coaching, and speaking engagements at Reach out to Dawn

Feed Your Confidence, Not Your Fear—Tips to empower your confidence

Dawn Picture at RRHow often do you “buy-in” to your fear?  Isn’t it self-defeating and un-empowering? It can be down-right crippling.    If you continually feed your fears, you are going to stay “small” and deal with non-serving beliefs about yourself.  Kick your fears to the curb!  You will always feel some “fear” in your life.  Fear is normal and can actually help empower you to make wise choices in your life.  But, when fear controls your life and holds you hostage—it is time to divorce your fears.  Now you may be thinking that this is not so easy, but let me assure you—you can do it if you want to release your fears.

For example, I talked to a lady recently who felt inspired to be a motivational speaker.  In fact, she was dreaming about it.  Now, your dreams can be a powerful sign for you to take action.  Her fear of standing in front of others and what they would think of her was keeping her from taking the action to fulfill her dream.  This happens to many people and some people can “break-through” it and others need a little assistance.   Did you realize our fears can be a form of “gremlin” that can actually protect us? That’s right! Let me explain.  In the case of this lady, her fear aka “gremlin” was protecting her from being embarrassed in front of others and people finding fault with her.   In reality, this kind of “protection” keeps us small and a “leader in hiding”.   For goodness sakes!  There are people out there that really need you and your services. They are only going to connect and resonate with you.

If you are noticing how your life or your business is unfulfilling or that issues are coming up that are making you uncomfortable, that is probably your sign that you are not where you need to be right now.  It’s time to step up and “break-through” your self-made wall that is keeping you on the side of unhappiness and fulfillment.   Don’t be looking for others to rescue you. They have their own issues to work on.  You empower yourself when you do the work needed to step into the person you want to be on this earth.  Now, let’s kick that door down!  If you only realized you are giving away your personal power when you are constantly seeking answers from others. You are your own “expert” in your journey of life. Why not follow your own inner guidance and trust that you can positively change your life.   Are you ready to kick that door down?

First, realize that living “small” and playing “safe” may have protected you in the past from being embarrassed or dealing with critical people.  Just own it and don’t judge yourself.  It served you in the past.  However, if you are really ready to move on and be more empowered, you must have a “talk” with your fear aka “gremlin” and tell it that it has served you well in the past and has protected you.  You may even feel thankful for the protection it served you.  But, you are ready and willing to spread your wings and get the training you want, join a toastmaster’s organization or speak up for a raise in your job now.  Tell your fears or gremlin “thank you and to hit the road now”, because you feel protected in your knowledge that you are able to move forward and that your inner guidance is now going to empower you.

Second, keep some kind of record so you can later realize how far you have come with your own personal-growth.  Often times people take things for granted and fail to realize that even little baby steps are steps of empowerment and lead you in the right direction on your journey.  I find that the more things you express gratitude for, the more grateful experiences will pop into your life.  This has been proven over and over again.  I could share so many amazing opportunities that have entered my life because I express “gratitude” daily.   The heart puts out more energy than the brain does.  Let your appreciation for your personal self-growth and gratitude come from the heart.   Have fun with it and be creative! Some people will write notes and put it in a jar to read later.  It can be helpful to read when you are having a bad day.

Most people can use a little more “confidence” once in a while.  As a hypnotherapist, I created an MP3 called “confidence” that can be listened to in a comfortable place where you will not be interrupted.  It is a guided meditation/hypnosis session that offers suggestions of relaxation and confidence.  Hypnosis is simply a guided meditation.  When you can access your subconscious through meditation/hypnosis, you are able to use mind over matter, with positive suggestions to help you achieve an outcome you desire.  Be sure that you don’t listen to it while operating any heavy equipment.   Always seek professional medical help if needed, this audio cannot replace medical care that you may need.  Here is to more empowerment and staying on the journey to self-growth, self-love, and self-respect!  You can access the “confidence” audio here:  http://dawnmariewestmoreland.com/confidence-hypnosis/

 

Dawn Westmoreland knows what it’s like to be un-empowered and feeling like a “victim”.  After blowing the whistle on her former government manager, Dawn endured two years of retaliation and bullying that resulted in her landing in a mental health ward for three days.  Dawn checked herself out and promised herself that she would never be a “victim” again and she would help others who wanted to move forward in their lives.  Dawn later settled with this government agency and began training to become a Life Coach that empowers professional women today.  She is sought out by media and has finished over 30 radio/magazine interviews about her journey and how she is empowering women today.  Dawn has begun writing her book about her story and tips for others to overcome their “old stories”.  The Christian Science Monitor also has praised Dawn for her bravery and empowering women today.

Negativity In Your Life?  Three tips to empower you

dawnIt is simply amazing, that as a community of people, there are quite a few miserable people on this earth.  How can this be, when we have so many venues to help us be happier and healthier in our lives?  If you are glued to the TV for the latest sensationalism, you are going to get a big dose of it, but it probably won’t make your day brighter.  Most TV stations are featuring negative and energy-draining broadcasts.  You may know people who are constantly sharing their fears or negativity about life, their work or about relationships.  We are conditioned by our culture, community, parents, teachers, mentors, and others who may share their concerns with you.   Many probably mean well and don’t realize the impact they are imparting on others.  In reality, they do their best with the experience and conditioning they have received in their lives.  Don’t fret!  We do have choices and can choose our thoughts and actions wisely.

First, pay attention to your inner guidance or your feelings.  If you have a “gut” feeling that something is not right, don’t dismiss it as nonsense.  We are all equipped with different “gifts” of intuition.  Trust yourself and your intuition.  For example if you have feelings of concern or you feel repelled towards someone, that could be an indication that you should be concerned about that person.  They may be someone who will take advantage of you or may not be a good person to hang around.  Don’t be afraid, just trust yourself on this one.   Your feelings are valid and should not be discarded because you don’t want to hurt someone.   You should always be respectful and decent to people, but you get to choose your friends and the people you want to be in your life that lift you up and keep you inspired.

Second, be mindful of the people, places and events in your life.  If you are constantly hanging around negative people or watching TV shows that make you depressed, consider limiting your activities around them.  While we cannot control everything in our lives, we have lots of control in our own homes and who we bring into our lives as friends.  Everything on this planet is “energy”.  We are energy too.  Yes—created by our Creator.  When you take in negativity, it can severely affect you and especially empathetic people.  Every day, I have a practice of visualizing “white light” emanating from inside of me and spreading throughout my home, property, and to other locations which I believe need to have positivity and pureness.   It really does work!  Try it sometime.  I have sent “white light” to places that are far away and later learned that they are feeling much better and the air seems “lighter”.   White light will remove “darkness” if you set the intention of love and light.  It will never harm anyone because it can only help with removing negativity and darkness.  Sometimes you may be going through a hard time and need some “white light” in your life.  You can start out with small issues and see that it works and then “go bigger”.

Third, there are times when you have created the “drama” in your life.   Just know that you have the power to change it with your thoughts, intentions and your actions.  You have “personal power” and were created and made in the image of our Divine Creator.   No one has to be a “victim”. You have the right and the skills to conquer many things in your life.   Stop blaming others or think they can control you!   Once you do this—you will become “unstuck” and able to take charge of your life.  Give yourself permission to let go of your “old stories” and make healthful life changes.  You can rely on yourself to get things done and ask people who want to see you succeed, to hold you accountable for taking action.   Just do it!  Many people find prayer to be very powerful.  It is part of my daily routine and I highly recommend praying for the things you need so you can become the person you want to be in your life.  Prayer works.

If you need more “confidence” to move ahead and to make positive changes in your life, you may need a little help.  I have created a complimentary “confidence” hypnosis/meditation audio that you can use daily to increase your confidence.   Many clients that come to me have issues with confidence.  Who couldn’t use a little more confidence in their life?   All you have to do is email me at CoachwithDawn@gmail.com and request your complimentary audio.  I know you will be glad that you did and I always love hearing your feedback on my blogs, services and products.

 

Dawn Westmoreland is a professional Life Purpose Coach & Hypnotherapist on a mission to empower and assist professional women who want to “break-through” their overwhelm, stress, and stop being “leaders in hiding”.  She has been featured in the Christian Science Monitor for her bravery and empowering people with her work.  You can learn more about Dawn and her services at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Who Stole Your “Personal Power” from You?  Five Tips for Recovery

Dawn Westmoreland Full size picture(2)Are you constantly worried about what others think of you or that you won’t fit in with certain groups?  Do you “give in” easily to other people’s demands or you have given up hope that you will ever be truly heard?   As human beings in a spiritual body, I know that many of you have experienced it—giving away your “personal power”.    You have taken the unappreciative comments from another person or you have felt “isolated even though you are in a crowd of people.  It’s one of the worst feelings in the world.

Garbage men are often looked down upon from some people who feel they have achieved a “higher” status in life.  When I lived in Southern France for eight months, the garbage men went on strike for higher pay and better “holiday” time off.  I will never ever forget it.  They went on strike for one month and refused to pick up any trash till they got their demands.  I will not describe the smell or tell you what it looked like.  We all know what kitchens smell like if we don’t get the trash out in a timely manner.  Those garbage men got everything they wanted and I must say, I was secretly impressed and happy for them.

So often we give away our “personal power” and don’t realize why we are not being treated with respect.   You must believe in yourself, more than others believe in you.  If you are not being treated with respect, there may be a chance that you don’t respect your own self.  Hey it happens!  Been there myself and got the tee-shirt.  I also burned that darn tee-shirt a while ago.  I learned the hard way to find my own self-love and self-respect.   I am always excited to help others find it a whole lot faster than I did.  It’s time to burn that tee-shirt if you have it.  Let’s dive in and take action to stop giving away your “personal power”.

First,   Part of being a human being is feeling valued, appreciated, and having a sense of belonging.  There is no one on this earth that is more valuable than you or deserves more than you do.  That’s right!  We are all God’ children and if you have a different faith or belief, than choose your “source”.  Slow down a little in your life and notice the “signs” that are always there that tell you that you are connected to the divine and you are never ever alone on this earth.   I am constantly finding these “signs” and it was only when I really slowed down that I began to notice them.   Are you going so fast that you need to take yourself off of autopilot? Our society has conditioned us to go-go-go all the time and many times you are just being “busy” and really not as productive as you would like to be in your life.

Second, on this earth, you must put yourself first, before others.  There are so many people “serving” others and they are burning out because they are not nurturing themselves and practicing self-care.  Compare it to driving a car for a long time and not maintaining it.  The car will break down eventually because it was not maintained.  You must fulfill your needs first, so you can respond and care for others.  You may be more “driven” or motivated than your spouse or partner, you cannot change them, but you can change yourself.   And you must take action to fulfill your future or you will most likely experience being “uncomfortable” or that things are not working out the way you want them to be.  Sometimes we have to experience misery or being uncomfortable so that we are “prompted” to be in alignment with our life purpose.  This is no joke.  Being in the mental health ward for three days was the best “gift” ever for me.  I realized I was working in a job that was totally unfulfilling and working with people who had very low energies.   It “shifted” me quickly to train in a year-long program to be a Life Coach.  What a “gift”!

Third, stop worrying what others will think of you.  They are responsible for their actions and emotions.   You must be fair and considerate to others, as it is always the right thing to do.  If you compassionately share some unpleasant news and the other person cries or gets mad, it probably means that they have some “unresolved” issues in their life that they need to heal or resolve.  They may have been hurt in the past from a bad experience and it is still “unresolved” and eating away at them.  Each of us has to “heal” ourselves and make amends with issues that have harmed or hurt us.  We cannot “will” away some one else’s hurt or pain.  We can be there for them and show support, but we cannot do the work for them.  There is no magic pill.  Healing or forgiving others can be hard work, but definitely worth it in the long run.

Fourth, if you are seeking answers from everyone else, but yourself.  Stop it right now!   You have an opinion and an “expert adviser” in you for many of the answers you are seeking.  Stop asking someone else about how you should handle your affairs, unless you are seeking professional advice that you truly need.  I see this over and over with people. They will ask me what I think about a matter involving them.   I will turn it around in an empowering question and ask, “How are you giving away your personal power” to me when you know better than I, what is best for you.  I never give advice to people.  I will provide information that could be valuable to them, but want others to feel empowered because they become their own leader and take charge of their life.  Think about it yourself—how do you give away your own “personal power”?  When you realize it–that is the first step.   Now take appropriate action for yourself.

Fifth, I use to run track in high school.  I was pretty good too.  I was running a race and I looked back and that was all it took to slow me down and the other runner won the race.  I was so disappointed in myself that day.  My coach and my mother told me later, that if I had not looked back, I would have won the race. How often are you comparing yourself with others or you are feeling insecure because someone is further down the “track” than where you are at this time?  Often times, people who are successful will open up their wings more and take more risks in life.   They don’t play small and they are competing against themselves so they can be their very best.  Just keep your eyes on the goal and outcome you want in life. Stop comparing yourself and getting upset if someone else is doing better than you.  They have bad days too!  Consider this—what is the most loving and empowering thing you can do today, to help you achieve your goals or live the life you deserve?

I am about to create a “confidence” hypnosis/meditation MP3 soon.   If you have never experienced hypnosis—it’s simply a guided meditation designed to relax you while you benefit from suggestions provided.   If you want to get a copy, be sure to sign up for my newsletter.   I offer complimentary products from time to time, and only in my newsletter.  Sign up for my newsletter at http://eepurl.com/8vFN1   The “confidence” MP3 will be included in my next newsletter.

Here is to your “Empowerment” and a great week!

Warmly,

Dawn Westmoreland

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Five Reasons Why I Was Able to Overcome My Miserable Life

Dawn and VirtueWe all experience miserable life experiences from time to time.  We may get a divorce, a spouse lets us down or we absolutely hate our job.  I could go on and on about miserable experiences, however, I would rather share my experience with you about “overcoming”.    When you are able to “own” your old stories, instead of your old stories “owning” you, empowerment and liberation prevails.   It is that simple.  Why live in misery, when you can feel better about your life and your circumstances.  Let’s go ahead and jump in and take action to “overcome” the misery we experience at times.

First, every experience in your life is a growing opportunity for you.  I had an experience a couple of years ago where I felt another person had demeaned me after they asked me what I had been up to lately.  I then shared with this person some of the rougher parts of my week. Their comments back to me were very harsh and cut me to threads at the time.  I actually cried because those comments made me feel so small and unappreciated.  I later realized that I had received a “gift” from this person because the experience reminded me of being a young child and getting a verbal lashing from my grandmother.  My grandmother was very stern and had grown up in an orphanage.  She was a very good person, but gave very tough love to me.  I never realized that I had unresolved issues with my grandmother.  The experience of receiving unkind and cutting words helped me to realize I needed to heal the past with my grandmother.  What an eye-opener and a gift for me!  I made peace with my grandmother, who has been dead for many years.  I no longer get as “triggered” by unkind people.  I fixed that problem.

Two, my life felt out of control and I was barely keeping up with my own self-care.  When you work too much and neglect taking care of yourself—you are going to pay a high price.  Your mental and physical health may begin to decline.    I experienced this myself when I ended up in the VA Mental Health ward for three days.  I neglected myself and wore myself out working too many hours on my two court cases against the Veteran Affairs.  The stress and my own neglect on self-care got me a three day stay in the Mental Health ward.   Not fun and the food really sucked there too!  Today, I schedule in self-care in my daily calendar.   I meditate, pray, get massages, receive energy work from a friend, and fit in the best thing I can afford to do, that helps me when I need it.

Three, we always have choices in our life. Have you ever looked back and realized you may have not made a good choice?  We all do!  For example, I had a consultation on the phone the other day with a female who had “bought in” to the fact that she should follow her parent’s advice for her career path. This was a truly gifted lady who wanted to work more in the “arts” and not work a boring job just for the benefits.   She was suffering from so much guilt and wanted the freedom to be herself and work in jobs that were more to her taste.  As children we may become conditioned by our parents who really love us and want the best for us.  However, when we become adults, we are giving away our “personal power” when we let others control our lives.  Most of us have been guilty of this at one time or another.   I use to give away my “personal power” all the time by trying to fit in with others or by trying to please others too much.   Today, it is much easier for me to “catch” myself before I give away my “personal power”.   I have my own choices to make and I am 100% accountable to myself. I encourage you to look at how you have given away your own “personal power” and make a decision to love and respect yourself more.

Fourth, can you think of someone who takes advantage of you or someone who is always complaining?  Don’t they just suck the energy out of you?  Some people call them Energy Vampires.  As I said earlier, we all get to make choices in our lives.  I found the best way to handle these kind of people is to set boundaries in our lives.  You don’t have to let another person abuse you or make you their sounding board.  Setting healthy boundaries with another person can be as easy as telling a negative person that you would rather not hear them complain about their life all the time. You could ask them to start telling you positive aspects of their life or avoid them as much as possible.  I often do this when I experience constant negative outbursts from people.   I also enjoy reading and recommend “Assertiveness for Earth Angels”, which is a book from Doreen Virtue.   This book describes many different kinds of personalities people have and how to become more assertive with each one.

Five, you must show up for your life.  If you are just riding the roller coaster of life and you are not in control, it is time to be accountable to yourself.  If your spending is out of control, get professional help.  If you can’t stand up for yourself, hire a life coach or hypnotherapist who can help you become more empowered in your life.   The worst thing you can do is think you cannot afford it.   The real truth is you cannot afford not to get help.  The real expense could come in the form of debt that financially drains you or an expensive divorce that drains you financially and emotionally.   You must invest in yourself and your life.  I do—I work with a business coach, who also has a coach and so on and so on…..  You always want to work with someone reputable that is doing better than you are at the time.  This way you are learning and growing. It has really paid off for me in so many ways.   I have made sacrifices to work with a coach so I could achieve the results I wanted, in a much faster manner than if I had done it on my own.   It was well worth it and I encourage you to invest in yourself so you can obtain the results you want in a faster manner.   My life is now happier, more peaceful, and I am excited to be a Life Coach and Hypnotherapist, who gets to help others become empowered.  We all deserve to have happy and have empowered lives.

If you feel kinda “stuck” in your life and need a “break-through”, request a complimentary 20 minute strategy consultation with me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact

Here is one of my testimonials—“Dawn helped me to “break free” of some emotional baggage that was stuck for quite some time. It was quite surprising at first, but a calming sense of grounding and peace followed. Her loving energy made me feel nourished and focused. Wonderful experience. Will have to do it again!”

How to Believe in Yourself—Three Steps You Can Conquer

Believe in YourselfI remember my business coach telling me, “You have to believe in yourself more than others believe in you”, when I first started working with her last year.  Everyone experiences self-doubt at times.  Even I do sometimes.  I remember when I first spoke out against the prohibited personnel actions going on in the Veteran Affairs agency several years ago.  As soon as I filed charges against my management, I experienced severe work place bullying and retaliation.  At this time, I was also trying to encourage a good friend of mine from committing suicide due to their own workplace bullying.

My troubles began building as I was trying to down-size and sell my house.  My house flooded two times and my insurance company dropped me after paying me back for repairs of nearly $30k.   Now, the stress of all of this was starting to overwhelm me and I was feeling very discouraged at this time.  I had so much self-doubt at the time and wondered if I could conquer all my goals.  It took about nine months and a lot of up-grades to sell my house.  The house and property were very nice, but would appeal to only someone who loved being on the side of a hill and loved to garden—I mean a lot of gardening!   I thought that my troubles could not get any worse and then the Veteran Affairs disregarded my doctor’s recommendation of being allowed to work from my home computer.   I refused to go back to the Veteran Affairs, to a hostile work environment and my management cut off my pay.  Mind you, I was paying for an attorney and living hand-to-mouth at the time.

The story has a great ending!  My troubles and self-doubt were conquered.  I settled with the Veteran Affairs in March 2014.  One week after settling with the Veteran Affairs, I became a Life Coach and now show people how to become empowered.  As a Life Coach, I don’t provide the solutions, but help people to realize where they are “stuck” in their lives so they can get “unstuck”.   Once they see what is holding them back, I am able to assist them with reaching their goals.  This is what empowerment is about.   Life is full of choices and it’s up to us to choose wisely.  So, how do you believe in yourself more?

First, you must take 100% accountability in your life.   If you are selling yourself short—stop!  Be responsible and make sure you are being accountable in everything you do in this life.  When you know you are being responsible and honest with yourself, it’s hard not to believe in yourself and what you are doing. If you don’t like your job—change jobs!   Own up to the mistakes you make, but don’t beat yourself up!  Learn from your mistakes and make the right action to grow from them.   I learned that I did not have to earn four degrees (after I had earned them) to impress my dead grandmother who had a PhD.  I was smart, without even earning a degree.

Second, take a good look at yourself in the mirror.  Are you your own best friend or worst enemy? If you are cringing to look at yourself and realize you have low self-esteem, take steps to improve your self-esteem.  Lose weight, exercise, go to a support group for help or reach out to a modality that helps you “shift” out of your old patterns or belief system that has been holding you back.  Life coaching and hypnotherapy are excellent ways to help with confidence and breaking old patterns.  It saved my life and now I do it to help others so they can feel better about themselves and have more confidence.

Third, no matter what you faith is, you will find so many benefits in asking for the help you need.  I use to ask God to please “fix” things for me.  Now, I ask God to please help me to become the person I need to become, so I can handle/manage things better in my life.  I have seen so many “signs” in my life, which tell me I am not alone and I am much loved.   I will find a white feather out of the ordinary and last night my stand-up fan turned on by itself.  These are “signs” to me that I am much supported and never alone on this earth—never.   These “signs” get my attention and gently remind me to believe in myself and know I am always supported.  We all have the ability to see “signs” and know we are loved.   Sometimes, we just have to slow down and pay attention.  We are all on this earth for a reason and we must believe in ourselves so we can fulfill our destinies.  We can do this when we fully believe in ourselves and realize what we are capable of doing on this earth.  Each of us are very powerful in a meaningful way.

I would be happy to explain to you how life coaching and/or hypnotherapy can help you to believe more in yourself.  Book a complimentary 20 minute session with me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact

Five Ways to Step Into Your Freedom

Dawn and VirtueHave you ever thought you felt “trapped” or “enslaved” in your life?  You may have a fancy home or the car of your dreams, but yet, something is really missing in your life.  If you feel that there is more to life than waking up, driving to work, working in a job that does not necessarily fulfill you, going home to spend time in front of the tube, you are not alone!  Recently I heard on the radio that three out of four people do not like their bosses.  That is a lot of unhappiness if you ask me. Let’s take charge of our lives and be accountable to us.  It’s time to step into your “freedom”.

Step one, if you are miserable in your life or job, you may not be in alignment with your true purpose on this earth.   Sometimes we must experience misery, being uncomfortable, and feeling unfulfilled to prompt us into positive action so we are living our true purpose.  Check in with yourself.  If you are not happy in your life, are you really doing the kind of work that you are passionate about and excited to do every day?  Are you with the partner or mate that truly makes you happy and brings joy to your life? Life is sooooo long when you are unhappy.  Take charge of your life!  Work in a job that makes you fulfilled and be with the person who makes your soul feel complete.

Step two, is “fear” controlling your life?  If fear is controlling your life, the fastest way to gain confidence is to tackle what you are afraid of because it will give you confidence.  Seriously.   I am talking about facing fear that is holding you back from being happier and more confident.  Life coaching and hypnotherapy are excellent tools to identify why fear is “protecting” you, holding you back in life, and provides the means to overcome the “fear” in your life.

Step three, is insecurity or lack of confidence keeping you a “leader in hiding”?  Anyone who has experienced life on life’s terms has probably been hurt by some experience.  We all get lessons in life, but we must not let them define us in a way that keeps us small in life.  We have to be accountable in our life.  No excuses!   Let go of the past, forgive the person who may have hurt you, take giant leaps of faith to become the person who can “overcome” the hardships that come up while living on this earth.  We forgive others so we let go of the negative energy or chords we have with the person who harmed us.

Step four, are you taking good care of yourself?  If you are eating poorly, watching too much TV, and making excuses why you can’t get a little exercise done, it’s time to really evaluate how you are treating your body.  When you look in a mirror, are you your own best friend or worst enemy?  Be mindful of all your actions in your life.  Life is always about choices.  Be smart.  Eat right.  Have fun, but treat your body right and it will reward you back.  We have all heard the phrase, “You are what you eat”.  There are tons of helpful advice on the internet.  Reach out for help if you need it.  You deserve it and others are counting on you to be in good shape.

Step five, if you are not in touch with your own intuition, it is high time that you connect with your intuition.  We all have some form of intuition.  Pay attention to the “signs” you get that confirm your intuition is right.  There are great courses you can sign up for and get help with credible instructors that can help you get in touch with your own intuition.  Being connected with your intuition is one of the greatest gifts we have and it can really help you make wise choices in your life.  It can help you find empowerment and the freedom you desire in your life.  So run, don’t walk…..and get in touch with your intuition.  Life is all about choices.  Make smart ones.  We are all much more powerful and intuitive than we realize.  That is mind-blowing, but the truth.  When we make smart decisions, it sets us free to become the person we really want to be in our lifetime.  Life is about choices.   Empower yourself and set yourself free.  Stop following the crowd.  Be a maverick if you want.   Freedom is a choice and you can have it too.   We only have to “unlock” our potential and step into the life we all really deserve.  That is what freedom is all about.

Dawn Westmoreland is a life coach and hypnotherapist on a passionate mission to empower women who are ready to come out “hiding” and become their authentic selves.  Dawn resides in Asheville, NC with her dog and two cats.  She offers a 20 minute complimentary “break-through” strategy consultation for women who want to take charge of their lives and are ready for positive change.  Request your complimentary session at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact

 

 

What would Martin Luther King Want Us To Do?

I often think of the great heroes like Martin Luther King who thought more of others than himself.  It takes a lot of guts to stand up against injustice of any kind.  He made a huge difference and he helped the blacks with the right to vote and be heard.  Can you imagine what today would be like if he did not protest in a peaceful way for equality and justice?  When you shed “light” on a dark matter it can bring awareness and positive change to the matter.  When we “b….h” and moan about how unfair things are, without doing anything about it, people suffer and so do we.  If you prefer to let someone else “fix” the problem, a part of you is giving away your own personal power.  It is truly healing and satisfying to help eradicate the darkness we see in our world.  If you know what your “gifts” are and use them properly, you can make a difference in making our planet a better place to live.

For example, one week after I settled with the Veteran Affairs for retaliation on me blowing the whistle on them, I began an extensive life coach training program.  As a military veteran, I qualified for the training to be paid by the VA Vocational Rehabilitation agency.  The VA Vocational Rehabilitation folks delayed approving my application and I ended up paying the 13k out of my pocket.   I was also required to take business training and complete an extensive business plan so I could become an entrepreneur and work for myself.  My case was excessively delayed and I was required to finish the business training/business plan before I could be reimbursed for my out of pocket costs.  I ended up attending life coach training and attending the business training at the same time.  This was utterly exhausting and draining on my mental and physical self.  It was a nightmare for me and put me in financial difficulty since I paid for the life coach training with money out of my pocket.

I ended up finishing the business training/business plan in Sept, but I was still not reimbursed for my out of pocket costs of around $13k.  Why am I telling you this story?  It’s not about me wanting pity or empathetic comments, it is about accountability for neglect, abandonment, and unprofessional behavior by an agency that was designed to help veterans.   The way to correct a problem is to shed “light” on it.  I contacted the Commission on Rehabilitation Counselors Certification (CRCC) agency and reported the unethical behavior of my VA Vocational Rehabilitation case managers.  Since I have 22 years of HR experience, I learned a long time ago to keep great documentation when needed.  The CRCC board member told me that I should look at the one of their ethics rules, which states, “ABANDONMENT PROHIBITED. Rehabilitation counselors do not abandon or neglect clients in counseling. Rehabilitation counselors assist in making appropriate arrangements for the continuation of services when necessary (e.g., during interruptions such as vacations, illness, and following termination)”.

I am in the process of turning in documentation that will support my claims of violations of neglect, abandonment, and unprofessional behavior that were exhibited by my case managers.  It has been one year and I have still not been reimbursed by the VA Vocational Rehabilitation agency that I am assigned to in North Carolina. I share this story to encourage everyone to take “action” to shed “light” on matters that not only affect you, but also affect others.  I am grateful for my HR background, morals and strength that motivate me to stand up to injustice and make positive changes that will help others who don’t know how to stand up for themselves.  I challenge you to make a difference and put your own positive “dent” in this world.  That is the greatest gift to mankind and to ourselves.

“The time is always right, to do what is right”

– Martin Luther King Jr.

MLKDawn Marie Westmoreland is a speaker, writer, life coach, hypnotherapist on a mission to empower and motivate women who want to “overcome” their old stories.  Dawn began her advocacy  and empowerment journey after standing up to injustice in her former government work place.  She endured two years of horrific bullying and settled with the agency in March 2014.  Dawn can be contacted for interviews and speaking engagements at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

The Art and Science of Self-Care

Self careWe all know that burnt out feeling when we are tired or overwhelmed in our life.  It may come on slow, but it can really affect us personally and professionally when we are not taking good care of ourselves.  We rush, we scatter, and we are running with our heads cut off………We think it is the way to success, by always being busy and multi-tasking.  With all the conveniences we have today, we seem to be still on “overloaded” with work and activities.   No wonder we are so darn tired!

Self-care is about taking care of yourself and your needs.  I find that getting energy body work and massage to be very healing and grounding.  When I get regular energy work and massage, I am able to focus more on my practice and it recharges my energy.  Our bodies need regular care and if we do not practice self-care, we will end up feeling burnt out, overwhelmed, and not succeeding in all our endeavors.  I highly suggest that you make it a practice to get a massage, receive body work or experience a modality that helps your body to feel better.  The body heals itself, but it does count on us to make wise choices and to be good to ourselves.

You never want to think of self-care as a luxury.  It is not.  It is a necessity that will keep your body “fueled” and in a homeostasis manner.  Pay attention to the food that you put in your body.  Is it free of pesticides, herbicides, dyes, additives, chemicals etc.?  Our body was not designed to eat poisonous foods and drinks.  Are you overweight and depressed?  It is time to evaluate the self-care you are giving yourself.  Are you getting the necessary exercise you need?  Sometimes, it is as simple as taking a daily walk and experiencing the benefits of an active body in motion.  It is well known that people sleep better at night when they have a good exercise routine.

I encourage you to evaluate how you can incorporate self-care in your life.  One of the best ways to see how your life is changing is to journal each day.  You can later review your trends and your accomplishments.   Be good to yourself!  Not only do you deserve it, but your body needs it.  I find that getting regular massages and energy work to be the best self-care for my body.  It shows too.  I have accomplished so much more in my life and people notice the difference in me too.  I attribute it to being better at self-care and loving myself in a healthier way.

Did you know that hypnosis is a great way to provide your body with self-care.   Not only is it extremely relaxing, but it is very effective in being therapeutic for your body.  Check out my complimentary “relaxation” hypnosis/meditation video at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com  You will find it on the top right side of my home page.  Enjoy.  Relax.  You are on your way to self-care.