Tag Archive for: dawn westmoreland

Courage is Your Best Dressed “Asset” Ladies—Three Tips to Empower You

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Tip #9                                                        I recently attended an event where makeup and the dress were touted as the route to empowerment and success. I call B.S. on it! I firmly believe that looking good is very important to our self-esteem, but at the end of the day it comes off and we are left with our naked self. We can rely on the “trappings” of makeup, undergarments that make us look better and beautiful clothes, but they only serve us for a while.

What is important is our thoughts, which form our belief system. How do we really feel inside? Are we making progress in our lives? If we are depending on our looks to get us to where we want to go in our lives—we are missing the mark and shortchanging ourselves. It’s courage to live the life we want that is empowering. Let me share three tips with you about how courage can move your forward in your life.

First, if you are working in a job where you are disrespected and not valued for your skills sets, it’s time to revalue you’re your belief system. If you think that you can never find another job that will pay as much or offers the same benefits, you are mistaken. There are many jobs that can be a better “fit” for you. If you are being bullied in the workplace or feel uncomfortable in your job, that may be the “push” to find a better job. Don’t listen to your “inner voice” that may try to tell you to play “safe”. Listen to your “higher knowing” that knows you were put on this earth for a reason and to share your gifts with others who are trying to find you.

If you need to get more skills, go back to school or take an evening course at your local college. Just don’t settle for the status quo and feel you should be grateful to have the job you are in if it’s unfulfilling or hostile. Know that you probably have many talents and skills that you have yet to use in the workforce. Tap into them and take action to find a better job for you.
Second, women are taking over when it comes to being an entrepreneur. We are stepping up in the world! Look around you—I bet you see it too.

Maybe you want to work for yourself or you have an idea that you would like to take further. According to http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/247767 the U.S. ranks No. 1 on the list as the best place for women entrepreneurs due to its overall favorable business environment and women’s job mobility in the private sector, it scored a 71 on a 100-point scale. It’s ok to feel scared. There is no shame in being fearful. Feel the “fear” and move through it. Find a support team or a cheerleader who is on your side. All women have fears, you get to choose what side of fear you want to be on—the dis-empowered side or the empowered side.

Hire a start-up business coach or go to an organization like SCORE. This organization gives free business advice as men and women who have run highly successful businesses and want to impart their knowledge to help others succeed as entrepreneurs.

Third, whether you want to find a better job or become an entrepreneur, it takes money to pay our bills and to grow in business. If you don’t have a savings account with enough money in it to fuel your dreams, it may be time to reconsider where your money is being spent. You may have to cut back on purchasing Starbucks coffee, the nail manicures, excess clothes buying etc. It’s when we conscientiously invest in ourselves that we are able to become more educated and self-evolve in our lives.

You will have naysayers in your life who will try to tell you how to live your life and to be grateful for the miserable job you may be in at this time. Ignore them. Find the strength in you to have the courage and walk away or ignore these people who are afraid to live the great life they could be living if they would tap into their own courage. Not everyone is going to understand why you left your old job or why you became an entrepreneur. The bottom line is that we are all entitled to live our lives fully and with great joy.

Dawn Marie Westmoreland is a workplace anti-bullying speaker, coach, author, and HR consultant. She has been featured in the Christian Science Monitor for alerting government officials of illegal activities in her former workplace and for empowering others who deal with workplace bullying. You can listen to her on radio, where she has been featured on over 50 radio shows as a guest.  She also became a #1 best-selling co-author for “The Strength of My Soul” anthology book, which is about 27 women overcoming their hardships and who are now living empowered and happier lives. To learn more about her services, check out DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

TSOMS with #1 ranking

How Strong is the Soul After Workplace Bullying?

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Dawn in Mar 2012--Two weeks after getting out of the Mental Health ward

Sometimes we are unaware how strong and powerful we are on this earth. The picture of me looking exhausted and dis-empowered was taken two weeks after passing out in my workplace due to the stress of two years of workplace bullying.  My skin really was yellow back then and I had purple discoloration under my eyes at the time of this picture.  I ended up being taken to the Charles George VA Medical Center for treatment from the Midatlantic Consolidated Patient Accounting Center (MACPAC), which is the “revenue” agency within the Veteran Affairs. I had reported numerous managers for nepotism (illegal hiring of family and friends in the government by management) and other prohibited personnel matters. My management did everything they could to “break” me and to get me to quit my job, but I was determined to hold them accountable, which I did in March 2014. It was an “emotional victory” when I was able to refuse signing a “gag order” settlement that would keep me quiet and unable to share my story to help others who deal with workplace bullying.

Memories of all the “tactics” used to harm me, actually “liberated” me. If you are being bullied in the workplace, you also can become “liberated” too. I look back at all the false charges placed upon my character as I was on Administrative Leave for about 100 days, the wrongful denial of being given a medical Reasonable Accommodation as a severely disabled veteran, the hateful looks, and the denial of promotions, while management’s friends rose in their own promotion system, which was illegal. Reflecting back, I remember the man who called me on December 23, 2014 and told me he wanted to hire my healing services, but wanted no records and he would pay with cash. He asked me if I worked with gay people. That made me highly suspicious of this being a deceitful natured call. Who calls someone and asks if they work with “gay people”? I knew my Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) hearing was coming up in a couple of months and my “gut” was telling me that this call was not from a honest man. The entire call sounded like a “script” being read. Highly suspicious!

“Red flags” were coming up for me and I felt that this was no ordinary call. When I accepted the call and answered it, I had noticed it was from a “restricted’ caller, which denied me their phone number on my caller identification. While I listened to him, my intuition was also providing me with “insight” that this was not a normal call and he was up to something “shady”. I could even hear machinery in the background, which was common while I was waiting for my Equal Employment Opportunity hearing with the Administrative judge. I felt like the call was a “trap” of some kind and politely told the man that I did not feel that we were a good “fit” to work together and ended the call. Later 30 pages of my Facebook posts were entered into the “discovery” phase of the EEO process. All of my posts were positive and inspirational, which baffled my attorney and I. It appeared to me that desperate attempts were made to find something derogatory on me. That never happened. I had done no wrong.

When you deal with workplace bullying, you may experience a little or a lot of bullying. It really does not matter how much harm you receive–it’s how you perceive your own situation. Your thoughts form your belief system. Isn’t it time to evaluate if your belief system is supporting you for your highest good? Maybe it’s time to take a deep breath, and allow that breath to slowly be released, along with releasing old thought patterns that are keeping you trapped and small in your life.

You may be wondering how you can become liberated from workplace bullying. If you are a sensitive person, you may have a harder time working with aggressive workplace bullies. They sense that you are a “nice person” and according to statistics with the Workplace Bullying Institute, up to 37% of the people who are bullied in the workplace are targeted because they are compassionate and kind people. Often times, bullies perceive you as a “weak” person or an “easy target” to harass. Sometimes our “gifts” in our life come in ugly wrapping paper. The lesson or “gift” you may get out of bullying can help you to find comfort, healing, and owning your “personal power”. Let me explain. For me–I had to realize that the biggest bully was myself for thinking I was a “victim” during this time. That lesson propelled me forward to work on my own personal issues and become “free” from my past dis-empowerment. You may find that you get the “gift” of learning you need to set healthy boundaries in your life with all people or you may discover you need to work on having more self love and self respect. This give you the opportunity to discern on ways to “liberate” yourself and become happier in your life.

No matter how bad your situation is around workplace bullying, there is always an option you may never have thought about or an action you should take on your behalf. Keeping good records is always important. You can learn more about the importance and how to document at  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1ZrLOMccHg  Once you “liberate” yourself and stand in your power, you may move onto a better job where you are treated with respect or you may become an entrepreneur like myself. What ever you do–live your soul’s purpose with great joy!

p.s.  If you would like a complimentary 20 minute strategy session with me about workplace bullying.  Reach out and contact me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Dawn empowered on the bridge

The Formula for Recovering From Workplace Bullying

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dawns-book-cover

You hear about it and read about it in the media, all the time. Workplace bullying is increasing according to who is keeping statistics. It’s a known fact that the damage to the ‘victim’ is harmful and creates many hardships for the ‘bullied’ and their loved ones. When I became a Veteran Affairs (VA) Whistle-blower, I alleged nepotism (illegal hiring of family and friends) and other prohibited personnel practices. I turned in numerous personnel and was retaliated for my actions. I was put on administrative leave for about 100 days, denied the right to seek medical care as a severely disabled veteran, I landed in the Mental Health ward after two years of horrific bullying, and my paycheck was cut-off when I refused to go back to a hostile work environment. This created a financial hardship and my whole economic portrait was much compromised. The life I knew was changed in a short time.  I also experienced having poor credit to boot because I could not afford my large house that I had worked so hard for and cherished.

Losing my old ‘self” was the greatest thing that has happened to me. Back in those days, I “bought into” the victim role. I felt very unsafe and insecure with myself.  These days, I often pass the road that would take me to my former job location. I smile each time and then I say ‘thank you” to the bullies who tried to break me and destroy my reputation.   For if it was not for my former bullies, I may not be as liberated as I am today.   My bullies were awesome teachers! I had to work on myself to get this far with my ‘liberation’. I have deep gratification for my workplace bullying experience. Sometimes our ‘gifts’ come in ugly wrapping paper. That’s exactly what happed in my case. Let me share three tips of how I claimed my ‘personal power’.

First, you get to decide if you are going to be a ‘victim’ of your workplace bullying. You may never get the results you think you want from workplace bullying, but you may get what you need to be happier. For example, if you end up leaving the job, you may find a more respectful position or even strive to be an entrepreneur. I have never been happier to work for myself and I love my boss! Sometimes it seems scary to leave a job you are comfortable with and have known for years. When you are striving to do your soul’s purpose on this earth, you may get an uncomfortable nudge to move forward and get in alignment with the work you should be doing–the work you love and can’t wait to do because it feels so ‘alive’.

Second, look at your experience as a lesson. What did you learn from it? Did you learn that you need to have more confidence or standup for your rights? Was the job or the position a ‘bad fit’? Perhaps you learned that you need to value yourself more and work in a job that is better suited for you. There are always lessons in each of our experiences. I believe we get to learn some great lessons from our bullies. They can teach us so much about ourselves and what we need to do to have a better life. Yes—they may make you anxious and depressed with their actions, but you can decide to not be a ‘victim’ and take all the appropriate action you need to stand up to them, leave the work place or find a solution that makes you happier.  Maybe you learned that you needed to learn how to get empowered and stop relying on unnecessary anti-anxiety or anti-depressant pills. NOTE: Always follow your doctor’s advice on medical care.

Third, bullying can take a serious toll on your confidence and self-esteem. You have to understand that you must believe in yourself more than others believe in you. No one can breathe confidence in you. There are many modalities out there that will help you find peace, confidence, and help you to find your own intuitive ‘gifts’.   You may find that exercising, receiving energy work, reading self-help books, taking empowerment courses or seeking reputable help from a coach, counselor or clergy member to be highly beneficial in helping you to heal. This will take some time, but it is so worth it! When you conscientiously invest in your own well-being, you will get results. I wrote a blog, “Five Tips Before Hiring a Life Coach” at Five Tips to Hire the Right Life Coach   Invest in yourself and also be gentle on yourself. Sometimes our worst bullies can be ourselves if we ‘beat up’ on ourselves. Another thing—if you are spending money on things that don’t empower you, that can back fire on you.   I know of a lady that spends endless money on clothes, trips and fun things that she enjoys. While there is nothing wrong with this, she complains she has no money to hire a coach/consultant for her own workplace bullying case. Hmmmmmm! Do you think her priorities are good ones or could she re-think her priorities? It’s sad, because she is being bullied for blowing the ‘whistle’ on her workplace, but could really benefit from an HR consultant or a coach that deals with workplace bullying. You always get to decide and make choices in your life. You must decide wisely or it may backfire on you.

If you need some help or advice, I have 22 years of Human Resources experience, a Masters in Management/Human Resources, I am retired from the United States Air Force, and I am regularly featured on the radio or in magazines for tips on overcoming ‘dis-empowerment’ and ‘workplace bullying’. Today, I am an anti-bullying speaker, personal power coach, author (Empowered Whistleblower: A Practical and Spiritual Path to Personal Power”, and an HR consultant.  I ‘settled’ with the Veteran Affairs in March 2014 and without a “gag-order” to keep me quiet and sharing my story to help others.  It bring me great pleasure to help empower people.  You can find out more about me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Kind People Can Stand Up to Bullying

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According to The Bully Institute, http://www.workplacebullying.org/tag/bullying-statistics/ the person who gets targeted the most in the workplace is the person who is considered kind and compassionate. Yikes, what if that is you in the workplace? Well, it was me when I worked in the Midatlantic Consolidated Patient Accounting Center (MACPAC), which is a Veteran Affairs organization in West Asheville, North Carolina.  Years ago, when I worked there,  I was asked by my former management to run an employee assistance program that would help MACPAC employees when they had economic issues that would come up. I was known for my “humanitarian” skills and for caring about other people.

Even though I consider myself a kind and compassionate person, I am a no-nonsense person when it comes to bullying or any kind of mistreatment in the workplace. Everyone is entitled to work in a safe environment and where they are treated with respect. After working 20 years in the Air Force as a female, I learned to be assertive when needed. That skill has come in handy many times in my life. I have never had a problem in being a “nice” person, but you must do so with healthy boundaries too. Let me explain. While I am a nice person, I held my bullies accountable and reported them to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) and “settled” in March 2014. I held my “ground” and had great documentation—I “settled” with the Veteran Affairs without a “gag order” that would prevent me from telling my story. How often do you hear about that? You can be nice and you can also stand in your “personal power”.

Your presence and your demeanor tells everyone how you feel about yourself. If you carry yourself with dignity and grace, that is the way you are generally perceived by others. Bullies, who generally have low self-esteem, can pick up your energy and know that you may be an easy target to harass. They generally go after the people they deem as weak.  I realize that there are many kind and “sensitive” souls who have dealt with hardships in their life—divorce, death, bullying, etc. It’s part of your own journey to become your greatest self, but only if you learn your lessons or experience self-growth from these experiences.

If your old “stories” are “owning” you, instead of you “owning” your old stories, then it’s time to heal your past. Nurturing old wounds and not healing them is a sure way to stay small and stuck in your life. You must let go of your “hurtful” past so you can fully live the life you deserve! You can reach out to a trusted clergy person, a coach, mentor, therapist or anyone who is reputable and will help you heal your past. If you want to be truly “free” in your life, you must forgive the perpetrators in your life and let go of your old “stories”. You are forgiving them for your own “healthy” reasons—to move on with your life and heal.

I spent many years dealing with self-loathing and insecurities because I was molested as a young child. After I dealt with forgiving the perpetrator and working on my own self-development, I really found my “inner strength” and began to realize I could now help others because I am on the “other” side. I will admit—it was not easy, but it was worth it! In the past, I have lived in fancy houses and had many materialistic things in my life, but I was not happy. I had attracted an “alcoholic” into my life and my home felt like a “prison” back in those days.   I did not realize at that time, that I was looking through the “lens” of a victim and someone who had not found their “personal power”.   I had attracted many negative things in my life because I had felt “hopeless” and very insecure back then. That has changed, because I took 100% charge of my life and began to “cut” out negative people out of my life as much as possible. I carefully discern on who I want as friends today and it really makes a big difference for me. Today, I have never had more “freedom” and peace in my life. You deserve it too!

Let me share a webinar, which is now a video, I made about “Commanding Respect in Your Life”. Here it is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oV12-pzac4   More free resources at  www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

 

dawns-book-cover

 

 

 

“How to Shine Out the Darkness in Your Life”

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We all deal with it—negative people, events, and situations and it can be draining, hurtful, and down-right nasty sometimes.  Let’s face it, there are people out there who are hurt, have not healed from their “issues”, and may be stuck in a “rut”.  These people may hurl insults or be negative around you.  It can be a surprise to see a grown man or women acting badly, but it happens all the time.  It even happens to me.  One of the best “tools” I have learned is to spread “white light” when there is negativity.  Let me explain.   Many spiritual people believe that white light is the space within the universe where positive energies are stored and can be released.  You can call upon it anytime and in any place.  People who are “empaths” may be one of the first people to notice or sense negative energies around them.  Empaths are very sensitive people who can often “feel” emotional energy from other people or even in physical spaces.

I have been very sensitive and an “empath” all my life.  I have continued to become more sensitive as I have gotten older too.    This can be great when you are a healer or work with people like I do as a Personal Power Coach.   On the other hand, it can be draining if you are picking up negative energy that a person puts out.  You don’t even have to be physically around them and you can still “feel” the negative energy.   Everything is energy and so are thoughts.  I can sense the energy of many things and I am not alone.  There are other empaths out there too and they may need a little help in negating energy that is not so pure and nice.  Plants need light to grow and we as human need light to thrive.  We live in a world that does have “darkness” and I will gladly share a tool to help you spread “white light” so you can help remove darkness and negative energy from your life.  This is a tool that one of my mentors, Martha Juchnowski taught me for my own usage and really does work!

First, imagine that you have white light emanating from your heart.  The heart puts out more energy than the brain does. Researchers have actually measured this with machines that can measure energy.   The heart is very powerful.  When you are imagining white light coming from your heart, begin to visualize it getting bigger and bigger so that it is now all of you and expanding around you.   You can make this “white light” as big as you want.  You can spread it in your house or in a friend’s house for example.  I do my own “white light” version with all of my loved ones and all of our pets, every single day. It works.  I visualize placing white light in their homes, all around their homes, their workplaces, and around their neighborhoods too.

Don’tDawn in Sylva, NC panic if you are not good at visualizing—that does not matter!  It’s all about intention and every thought is energy too.  So, basically you are sending love and light out when you are doing this.  When you do this you are spreading goodness, love, and pure energy.  Darkness and negative energy can’t live in a loving and pure environment.  It has to leave! It’s the law of the universe and I called that—God.  I have imagined white light spreading in a loved one’s entire house.  Later that day they informed me that the air felt so light and maybe it was the weather.   I can assure you that the weather in that neighborhood was rain for the past three days and that does not make the air seem “lighter”.

Try it sometime—shine white light around you, your pets, your home, your work space, and where ever you need it.  It cannot hurt anyone or harm them.  You may notice that people become happier or more at peace.  To me it seems miraculous, but I have seen some pretty cool stuff as a result of me shining white light on people, places, and situations.  You never do it with the intention of harming or hurting someone.  It cannot do that!  It just makes the energy around the person more pure and loving.  When you are emitting love or good energy, you are pushing away negativity.  People feel better and I bet you will too.  Love is powerful!

“The Leadership of Energy”

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While I was attending training to become a coach with the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC), I learned from their coaching program that there are seven levels of energy. You can learn more about iPEC at www.ipeccoaching.com  The founder of this wonderful coaching school is Dr. Bruce D. Schneider.  Let’s talk about energy.  Everything is energy—our clothes, our cars, and even our personal thoughts.  There are also two types of energy:  anabolic and catabolic.   Anabolic energy is healing, productive, positive, and growth-oriented. While catabolic energy is contracting, draining, and resistant.   If you feel like a “victim’ or feel “hopeless”, that is catabolic energy.  While you feel like a victim, you perception may be distorted and affect the choices that you make.   If you are non-judgmental and feel passionate about your life, you may be at the high-end of the energy levels.

If you feel fear, guilt, worry, self-doubt or have low self-esteem, you will be operating at the lowest level of energy and feel like a “victim”.  Feeling this low, makes you susceptible to feeling helpless and avoiding confrontation.  You may feel like you are “losing”.  This is a highly destructive energy level.  You may notice that you are attracting other “victim-like” people in your life because “like” attracts “like”.   But you don’t have to be a “victim” or feel like you don’t have choices in your life. You can raise your energy levels by becoming more “empowered”.

As you move up the energy levels, you may experience what is known as level two energy.  This is where a person may want to manage others by force or control.   A person may want to project blame on others.  It’s an “I win and you lose” situation in this energy level.  It is certainly better than being a victim, but it’s still catabolic energy that is draining you.  Do you really want to have level two energy?

Level three energy is an entry-level of anabolic energy, which is productive energy and more uplifting.  A person may take responsibilities for their thoughts, actions, and emotions.  They realize they have a choice in the matter and take accountability for this state of being.  This is an “I win, and hopefully you win, too” energy.  A person can motivate themselves and others through forgiving others, being more tolerant, and compromising with others.

When you have a level four energy, you take little or nothing personally and are able to be more objective.  There is more of a “You win” going on and a “service” before self-mentality.  This kind of energy lends to compassion for others and inspiration to serve others.  This fosters team work, loyalty, and collaboration with others.   It is definitely a high level of energy that lends to you becoming more successful and making a difference in this world.

Some of the greatest leaders in this world have a level five energy, which is a “We all win or no one wins” mentality.   The people who possess this energy tend to be calm, confident entrepreneurial, and powerful.  There is a sense of being in control of your life and destiny.   There are no challenges, but every experience in life is an opportunity for self-growth.  One of the core thoughts is that a person is “accepting” of others and does not try to change them.

Level six energy is an energy where a person sees everyone and everything as an extension of themselves.   Their intuition is very active and people possessing this energy can tap into being a creative geniuses and they are visionaries, along with being a conscious leader.   The mentality is “We always win”.  The feeling are of permanent joy, satisfaction and pleasure.  There is a great sense of connection with everything and everyone.

The highest level of energy is one that is characterized by complete objective thinking, being fearless, and are non-judgmental.   A person with this kind of energy can view things with complete objectivity.  The mentality for this energy level is “Winning and losing are illusions”.  It is hard to imagine that concept, but with practice you can achieve it.   Leaders who possess this energy are “masters” in their world and consciously co-create their life experiences.   These are the most powerful leaders in the world.

There are always advantages and disadvantages of each energy level.  Everyone can experience level one energy (Catabolic energy aka “victimhood”) at times and also experience level four energy (Anabolic/where you take nothing personal) too.   Your overall average of your energy levels can dictate how successful you are in your personal life and in your business.  Generally, the higher your energy levels, the more satisfied you are in your relationships, finances, personal self-growth, and your achievements.

It is great to have an awareness of who you are, you level of “consciousness” and how you act in your life.  If you are interested in learning more about the leadership of energy and how to determine where you “fit” in with these energy levels, you can request more information at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact    Just remember that every experience in our life is not a “challenge”, but an opportunity to grow and learn.  If you can truly accept and embrace that, you are raising your energy leadership.  Here is to an “empowering” 2015 and taking action to realize your dreams and Dawn and Virtuegoals this year!

“Loving the Unlovable”–tips on empowerment

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What a title! Can you relate? I sure can! I bet you know of someone in your life that drives you crazy and you would rather avoid them, then deal with their trauma and drama. When this person(s) enters the room, you feel your blood boil, your stomach cramp or you feel nauseous because this person can be very manipulative or narcistic. They may even be an “energy vampire” too, the kind of person that “drains” your energy with their presence and behavior, I have dealt with this experience myself and use to lose a lot of sleep over the raDawn pic for Newlife64ntings and manipulative behavior of a “energy vampire”. This person drove me crazy with rage and disgust because I felt they were continuously taking advantage of a loved one.

I realized that my “clairsentience”, which is intuition in the form of emotional input, gut feeling or physical feeling and my “Claircognizance”, which is when intuitive information just pops into your head, was developing and I had a sense of “knowing” about things and people. It drove me nuts and I wanted others to experience these insights like I did. We all have intuitive gifts. They are different for each person, but we all have intuitive gifts. It’s a matter of accepting these “gifts” and be open to them too. Once you are, be ready for your “gifts”.   These tools are invaluable if used correctly and they can be of great benefit in your personal life and business. I don’t claim to be psychic, but have different levels of intuitive “gifts” and I am grateful for them. I love using my “gifts” to help others.

Getting back to the “unlovable” people in your life. It has taken me many years to realize that these people can be the greatest “spiritual teachers” in your life. I have suffered and anguished over these kinds of people, until I was able to “let go” and trust that there is a reason for “unlovable” people in my life. They can teach you patience, standing up for yourself, and trusting that they are in your life for a “divine” reason. They can bring you closer to God or whatever source you are close to and they can also provide the best lessons in life. The “unlovable” are in your life for a reason—take time to discern over this and realize you have the opportunity of improving your spirituality and personal growth.  You get to choose and life is all about choices. I continually repeat this in most of my blogs.

The “unlovable” can come into your loved ones lives to teach them lessons and even you.   Since “like” attracts “like”, it can bring a narcistic/manipulative person to a person who has low self-esteem and may continually get treated with dis-respect. Once you are able to raise your energy levels and find self-respect, you will notice that the people in your life are “matching” your energy levels and your self-esteem.   That is why it is so important to work on self-development so you can experience the best relationships with others in your life.   Until then, you must set healthy “boundaries” in your life. That simply means that you cannot allow others to dis-respect you and take advantage of you. I love Doreen Virtue’s new book, “Assertiveness for Earth Angels”. I have read this book twice and highly recommend it to others who deal with “unlovable” people. Once you know how to deal with all kinds of people, life gets less messy and uncomplicated. Until you stand up for yourself and show your own self some R.E.S.P.E.C.T., you may find yourself repeating old behaviors that attract the “unlovable” in your life.

Now, I know we cannot pick our family members, but we can choose our friends very wisely. The five people we hang out with the most each day will have a profound effect on you. They will affect you personally, financially, and spiritually. Don’t beat yourself up on past experiences with “unlovable” people. Just learn the “lessons”, become more empowered and never stop growing—spiritually.   The worst people in my life have helped me to get closer to God and improve my own spirituality. Now, that is empowering! The “unlovable” can be loved, but sometimes it may have to be at a distance and with a lot of praying for ease and grace to be in your life.   Just remember they teach you many things in your life. They are not a challenge to you, but an opportunity to learn and grow. So, let it happen!

Who is Your Best Friend?

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Dawn smaller pictureIs the reflection in the mirror your best friend or worst ? I hope it is your best friend. There may be times that you think another person may be your enemy, but often times, the worst enemy can be yourself. I know this so well! No one has ever been meaner or mistreated me more than myself. The man who molested me as a child, the bullies in school, the alcoholic that nearly choked me to death, and the bullies who retaliated against me for blowing the whistle in the Veteran Affairs were not my worst enemies—I was my own worst enemy! That’s right.   My past negative thoughts formed a belief system that I was not worthy and I was not deserving. Thank goodness, I can laugh at all my lessons I overcame from my past. Isn’t it time to “own” your old stories, instead of your stories “owning” you?  Hell yeah!

You can purchase the “right” clothes and the “right” car (ok…truck in my case), but underneath it all, you have to love who you are and what you are doing in this world.  If there is pain behind your superficial smile, it’s time to get to work and become an empowered and self-loving individual. Hire a coach and bust through those “blocks” in your life that keep you in fear and insecure.   Don’t tell me you can’t afford a coach, unless you really cannot afford one.   For I will tell you that you cannot afford not to hire a coach if you are miserable or stuck in your life. The cost of living a “small” life or not getting what you want out of your life is very costly.   I saw the value in hiring a business coach and made appropriate changes in my life so that I could afford this investment in my life. You have to consciously invest in yourself and you must believe in yourself, more than others believe in you!

The benefits I received from hiring a  coach was that I began to see why I had made “bad” choices in my life and I was able to “shift” consciously to align with a better belief system. There were quite a few “aha” moments and awareness that I could make better choices in my life. I took immediate action and “shifted” my life very quickly. The investment in myself, not only improved my practice, but it positively affected my spiritual and personal life.   A coach can really help a client see what has been holding them back in their business and personal life.

Furthermore, a coach can help the client formulate a plan of action so that they are in alignment with reaching their goals and dreams.  Often times, all you need is a change of view on your belief systems. If you are doing the same thing, over and over, and not getting the results you want—it’s time to do something different. Don’t you think? When I overcame my own old “stories” and claimed my personal power that is when people really noticed me and many new “doors” opened for me. There is so much goodness in this world and it’s time to realize it! Sound good? I would love seeing a lot of happy people on this earth. What a win-win! Bring it on!

I would love to help you realize your goals and “bust” through the walls that have confined you and have made you a prisoner of yourself.   I help clients by phone, Skype, Google Hangouts or in person.  First time clients can receive a $40.00 (45 minute) “break-though” to success strategy with me by contacting me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact   By the way, be sure to be part of my newsletter community. I will be sending a complimentary copy of my first chapter in my book to everyone on my newsletter mail list. Join here: Dawn’s Newsletter

I will be sharing my own “story” of gloom and doom and how I “divorced” my victimhood. Today, I speak, write, “coach”, and get interviewed on radio/TV for the work I am doing to empower people. I am teaching workshops to help others become happier and liberated in their lives.   I can also be reached to discuss interviews, workshops, coaching, and speaking engagements at Reach out to Dawn

Feed Your Confidence, Not Your Fear—Tips to empower your confidence

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Dawn Picture at RRHow often do you “buy-in” to your fear?  Isn’t it self-defeating and un-empowering? It can be down-right crippling.    If you continually feed your fears, you are going to stay “small” and deal with non-serving beliefs about yourself.  Kick your fears to the curb!  You will always feel some “fear” in your life.  Fear is normal and can actually help empower you to make wise choices in your life.  But, when fear controls your life and holds you hostage—it is time to divorce your fears.  Now you may be thinking that this is not so easy, but let me assure you—you can do it if you want to release your fears.

For example, I talked to a lady recently who felt inspired to be a motivational speaker.  In fact, she was dreaming about it.  Now, your dreams can be a powerful sign for you to take action.  Her fear of standing in front of others and what they would think of her was keeping her from taking the action to fulfill her dream.  This happens to many people and some people can “break-through” it and others need a little assistance.   Did you realize our fears can be a form of “gremlin” that can actually protect us? That’s right! Let me explain.  In the case of this lady, her fear aka “gremlin” was protecting her from being embarrassed in front of others and people finding fault with her.   In reality, this kind of “protection” keeps us small and a “leader in hiding”.   For goodness sakes!  There are people out there that really need you and your services. They are only going to connect and resonate with you.

If you are noticing how your life or your business is unfulfilling or that issues are coming up that are making you uncomfortable, that is probably your sign that you are not where you need to be right now.  It’s time to step up and “break-through” your self-made wall that is keeping you on the side of unhappiness and fulfillment.   Don’t be looking for others to rescue you. They have their own issues to work on.  You empower yourself when you do the work needed to step into the person you want to be on this earth.  Now, let’s kick that door down!  If you only realized you are giving away your personal power when you are constantly seeking answers from others. You are your own “expert” in your journey of life. Why not follow your own inner guidance and trust that you can positively change your life.   Are you ready to kick that door down?

First, realize that living “small” and playing “safe” may have protected you in the past from being embarrassed or dealing with critical people.  Just own it and don’t judge yourself.  It served you in the past.  However, if you are really ready to move on and be more empowered, you must have a “talk” with your fear aka “gremlin” and tell it that it has served you well in the past and has protected you.  You may even feel thankful for the protection it served you.  But, you are ready and willing to spread your wings and get the training you want, join a toastmaster’s organization or speak up for a raise in your job now.  Tell your fears or gremlin “thank you and to hit the road now”, because you feel protected in your knowledge that you are able to move forward and that your inner guidance is now going to empower you.

Second, keep some kind of record so you can later realize how far you have come with your own personal-growth.  Often times people take things for granted and fail to realize that even little baby steps are steps of empowerment and lead you in the right direction on your journey.  I find that the more things you express gratitude for, the more grateful experiences will pop into your life.  This has been proven over and over again.  I could share so many amazing opportunities that have entered my life because I express “gratitude” daily.   The heart puts out more energy than the brain does.  Let your appreciation for your personal self-growth and gratitude come from the heart.   Have fun with it and be creative! Some people will write notes and put it in a jar to read later.  It can be helpful to read when you are having a bad day.

Most people can use a little more “confidence” once in a while.  As a hypnotherapist, I created an MP3 called “confidence” that can be listened to in a comfortable place where you will not be interrupted.  It is a guided meditation/hypnosis session that offers suggestions of relaxation and confidence.  Hypnosis is simply a guided meditation.  When you can access your subconscious through meditation/hypnosis, you are able to use mind over matter, with positive suggestions to help you achieve an outcome you desire.  Be sure that you don’t listen to it while operating any heavy equipment.   Always seek professional medical help if needed, this audio cannot replace medical care that you may need.  Here is to more empowerment and staying on the journey to self-growth, self-love, and self-respect!  You can access the “confidence” audio here:  http://dawnmariewestmoreland.com/confidence-hypnosis/

 

Dawn Westmoreland knows what it’s like to be un-empowered and feeling like a “victim”.  After blowing the whistle on her former government manager, Dawn endured two years of retaliation and bullying that resulted in her landing in a mental health ward for three days.  Dawn checked herself out and promised herself that she would never be a “victim” again and she would help others who wanted to move forward in their lives.  Dawn later settled with this government agency and began training to become a Life Coach that empowers professional women today.  She is sought out by media and has finished over 30 radio/magazine interviews about her journey and how she is empowering women today.  Dawn has begun writing her book about her story and tips for others to overcome their “old stories”.  The Christian Science Monitor also has praised Dawn for her bravery and empowering women today.

Negativity In Your Life?  Three tips to empower you

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dawnIt is simply amazing, that as a community of people, there are quite a few miserable people on this earth.  How can this be, when we have so many venues to help us be happier and healthier in our lives?  If you are glued to the TV for the latest sensationalism, you are going to get a big dose of it, but it probably won’t make your day brighter.  Most TV stations are featuring negative and energy-draining broadcasts.  You may know people who are constantly sharing their fears or negativity about life, their work or about relationships.  We are conditioned by our culture, community, parents, teachers, mentors, and others who may share their concerns with you.   Many probably mean well and don’t realize the impact they are imparting on others.  In reality, they do their best with the experience and conditioning they have received in their lives.  Don’t fret!  We do have choices and can choose our thoughts and actions wisely.

First, pay attention to your inner guidance or your feelings.  If you have a “gut” feeling that something is not right, don’t dismiss it as nonsense.  We are all equipped with different “gifts” of intuition.  Trust yourself and your intuition.  For example if you have feelings of concern or you feel repelled towards someone, that could be an indication that you should be concerned about that person.  They may be someone who will take advantage of you or may not be a good person to hang around.  Don’t be afraid, just trust yourself on this one.   Your feelings are valid and should not be discarded because you don’t want to hurt someone.   You should always be respectful and decent to people, but you get to choose your friends and the people you want to be in your life that lift you up and keep you inspired.

Second, be mindful of the people, places and events in your life.  If you are constantly hanging around negative people or watching TV shows that make you depressed, consider limiting your activities around them.  While we cannot control everything in our lives, we have lots of control in our own homes and who we bring into our lives as friends.  Everything on this planet is “energy”.  We are energy too.  Yes—created by our Creator.  When you take in negativity, it can severely affect you and especially empathetic people.  Every day, I have a practice of visualizing “white light” emanating from inside of me and spreading throughout my home, property, and to other locations which I believe need to have positivity and pureness.   It really does work!  Try it sometime.  I have sent “white light” to places that are far away and later learned that they are feeling much better and the air seems “lighter”.   White light will remove “darkness” if you set the intention of love and light.  It will never harm anyone because it can only help with removing negativity and darkness.  Sometimes you may be going through a hard time and need some “white light” in your life.  You can start out with small issues and see that it works and then “go bigger”.

Third, there are times when you have created the “drama” in your life.   Just know that you have the power to change it with your thoughts, intentions and your actions.  You have “personal power” and were created and made in the image of our Divine Creator.   No one has to be a “victim”. You have the right and the skills to conquer many things in your life.   Stop blaming others or think they can control you!   Once you do this—you will become “unstuck” and able to take charge of your life.  Give yourself permission to let go of your “old stories” and make healthful life changes.  You can rely on yourself to get things done and ask people who want to see you succeed, to hold you accountable for taking action.   Just do it!  Many people find prayer to be very powerful.  It is part of my daily routine and I highly recommend praying for the things you need so you can become the person you want to be in your life.  Prayer works.

If you need more “confidence” to move ahead and to make positive changes in your life, you may need a little help.  I have created a complimentary “confidence” hypnosis/meditation audio that you can use daily to increase your confidence.   Many clients that come to me have issues with confidence.  Who couldn’t use a little more confidence in their life?   All you have to do is email me at CoachwithDawn@gmail.com and request your complimentary audio.  I know you will be glad that you did and I always love hearing your feedback on my blogs, services and products.

 

Dawn Westmoreland is a professional Life Purpose Coach & Hypnotherapist on a mission to empower and assist professional women who want to “break-through” their overwhelm, stress, and stop being “leaders in hiding”.  She has been featured in the Christian Science Monitor for her bravery and empowering people with her work.  You can learn more about Dawn and her services at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com