Tag Archive for: Healing

Dos and Don’ts on Social Media When You are Being Bullied at Work

/0 Comments/in /by

Dawn empowered on the bridgeIt feels great to share your concerns or your victories on social media. It can feel gratifying to get approval or “likes” on your posts.  But—can your social media posts backfire on you?  Yes, they can.  If you are venting about your workplace bullying and using a person’s name, you could be committing defamation of character.  According to http://thelawdictionary.org/article/how-do-you-prove-a-defamation-of-character-claim/:

 Slander and Libel

“There are two different types of defamation of character. The first is when someone verbally says a false statement about you. This is referred to as slander. The second is when someone writes down or publishes a false statement about you. This is referred to as libel.

The Final Step

Once you have proven to the court of law that the statement made against you was, in fact, false the last step is proving that the statement caused some form of damage to you or your reputation. Most lawyers are going to tell you that despite being the last step in the process proving that a statement has caused you harm is the most difficult part of the process. First of all, there is a clear different between a statement having the potential to cause you problems and the statement actually causing you problems. It is only considered defamation of character if the statement has actually caused you harm, not if it has the potential to cause you harm.

In order to win the claim, you are going to need to prove that the false statement has always ruined your reputation. If you are a business owner, for example, you would need to prove how the statement has had a devastating impact on your business. The unfortunate truth is that this does mean you will have to wait for the false statement to cause problems in order for the court to take action against them”.

Everyone has “rights” and if you “verbalize” or “publish” derogatory comments about another person, you could end up with a liability suit against you.  This could get very “sticky” as you will have to prove your comments as being “true”.  This could have the potential to tie you up in court and legal fees for years.  Is it worth it? Most people who are dealing with workplace bullying need an outlet to express their concerns and seek guidance from others who are experiencing the same issues.

A safer way to join a Facebook group that supports people who deal with workplace bullying is to make up a fake (pseudo name). I recommend never using another person’s name in your posts or comments, but discussing your issue in “general terms”.  If you join a Facebook group under your “real name”, be careful with what you post.  Keep out names and circumstances that could be “used” against you if it falls into the wrong hands.  There are cases where the bully or their attorney has compiled social media posts to use against the “bullied”.  It would not serve you for your highest good to have the “other side” to have ammunition to use against you.

Documentation that presents compelling evidence can be very powerful.  If you have made social media posts that could be potentially damaging to you if it gets in the right hands, do your best to delete these posts right away.

There is no way that a Facebook administrator, who is in charge of a Facebook group will be able to know who is the “bully” or “bullied” in their groups.  Anyone can request to join a Facebook group or Twitter group.  Always be careful and If you have a court hearing or an Equal Employment Opportunity Community (EEOC) hearing, the “bully” or attorneys representing the bully may attempt to find a way to access your social media to see if they can find “evidence” or posts that could help them “leverage” control over you.  For example, if you are pursuing an EEO hearing, you have signed a “statement” that you cannot discuss your case, except with certain professionals.  Your case can be thrown out by the EEOC because you “discussed” your case with others that don’t fall under the criteria of the EEOC.

For example, if you are pursuing an EEO hearing, you have signed a “statement” that you cannot discuss your case, except with certain professionals.  Your case can be thrown out by the EEOC because you “discussed” your case with others that don’t fall under the criteria of the EEOC.

Don’t beat yourself up if you have made defamatory remarks about a bully.  Just be mindful in the future and protect yourself.  You never want a bully to hold “power” over you, especially if you can prevent it.  Reach out to resources that can help or encourage you.  Be mindful of social media groups or any group individuals that focus only on the “negativity” of their situation.  Everyone’s story is powerful to them.  The caution you must take is to be mindful of each person’s contribution to the group.  Are they positive or negative?

It is very cathartic (healing) to share how you feel about your bullying situation.  However, some people will not make the effort to improve their situation.  They will wallow in their sorrow because they appreciate the “pity” attention they receive. Some of them will complain and spew negativity, but they will do nothing to help themselves become empowered.   I think most people want to become empowered and want to know how to stand up to workplace bullying.  Pay attention to the people you surround yourself with because their “energy” will rub off on you.

Last, reach out to support groups or create your own ones so you can get the help your need and the support you deserve.  Be smart and remember, “You are always on Parade”.  You are observed by people who are visible and not visible in your life.  The best revenge for workplace bullying is living well and succeeding in life.

If you need help with your own workplace bullying or discrimination matter—you can find resources on my website at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com

Signs of Faith are Everywhere

/0 Comments/in /by

Signs of Faith are Everywhere

Signs of faith are everywhere and you must slow down to see them.  Just last week, I was in north Florida because my brother married his sweetheart on 12/13/14. It was an awesome wedding, only one week after my father passed away.  We had mourned our father leaving this earth and then embraced a wedding.  The wedding had been set up over a year ago and it turned out to be the happiest wedding I have ever experienced. I offered to pet sit my brother’s carrot-eating dog named Pugsley, while he was on his honeymoon. The weather was very comfortable and I took every opportunity to walk on Flagler beach, which is right below St Augustine, FL. I found myself asking for a “sign” on the beach one evening. I wanted to know that certain actions I was taking were the right ones for my personal, professional and spiritual growth. I soon walked upon five starfish, that had been swept up in the tide, in a matter of 30 minutes. Very few people find starfish like that on Flagler beach and I knew it was a sign that I am being supported. It was also clear to me that I am on the right career track for my life. I threw all of the starfish back but the one I knew was no longer alive and it was very dried out. It is my reminder that I am always being supported in my life and there are signs to prove it.

Often times I will find things that are out of the ordinary and I know they are signs. We are always supported and never truly by ourselves in this world. I remember walking into my closet and looking at the stack of sweaters in my closet on day. I began to think that I needed to donate some of them because I was not wearing them. All of a sudden, one of the sweaters drops to the floor. Of course I laughed! The sweaters were nicely stacked towards the back of a shelf and the sweater did not just fall to the floor because it was close to the edge of the shelf. Another sign! Like many people, I have been guilty of trying to explain everything and ignoring my own intuition. We all have intuition and it’s up to us to develop it and use it properly. It is highly beneficial in my coaching practice.
I remember constantly seeing a blue butterfly in the summer time that would always dance near me when I went outside. Butterflies are a sign about transformation and I knew I was in one hell of a transformation from my old self. My transformation has been mostly about “overcoming” and stepping into my spiritual gifts. My past no longer haunts me and I have become an “Overcomer” of my old stories. How did I “overcome” my old stories is a constant question I receive by those who want to overcome their own stories. I had to learn to trust my faith and that the “signs” I constantly see in my life are meant to assure me that I have all the support I need. As, I walked off the beach after seeing those five starfish that evening, I caught a glimpse of sparkling gold lights out of the corner of my eye. Yes–another amazing sign! We are all supported, loved, and never alone. We must trust our faith.

If you are ready to kick-start your 2015, be sure to ask for your complimentary 20 minute “break through” strategy session with me.  You can contact me at www.DawnMarieWestmoreland.com/contact  for your complimentary session.  You deserve it!

Step Into Your Personal Power

/0 Comments/in /by

Healing Thyme Services logo

 

Let’s face it!  Do you ever feel tired and out of energy?  Have you considered how your energy is leaking from you and leaving you empty?  Our minds are so powerful and our thoughts play a large role in how we view our world.   Our thoughts are the foundation to how we live and think.   Life is either good or bad according to our belief system.  We can control our thoughts and become a leader of our thoughts!  I encourage you to pay attention to your thoughts first thing in the morning.  If you keep them positive, your day will likely be more productive and cheerful.

How can you find more positivity in your life?

  • Change a negative thought to a positive thought
  • Surround your life with positive people and events
  • Do activities that make you happy
  • Cherish the simple pleasures in life–there are many out there
  • Be around people that make you feel good
  • Love yourself unconditionally–there is only one YOU!
  • Detach from negative people and events when possible

We can get so much support from positive people, but some people like drama and are energy vampires.   They enjoy the attention they receive being a victim or creating chaos.  We all know people who are like this. As a very sensitive person, who dislikes drama and chaos, I have to set boundaries with these kind of people. It’s not that they are bad.  I believe all people are good, but some are frightened and act out of fear.  These kind of people can “suck” out your energy in no time.   They want to tell you about all the drama in their life or they are continuously negative, which leaves you feeling fatigued and depleted.   While we all have our “bad” days, we need to keep things in prospective.  So what can you do to help yourself from getting “sucked in” by energy vampires and negative thoughts?

First, notice how you are feeling.  If you are feeling uncomfortable around a certain person, that is a sign that your energy is being compromised. This is a time to notice and take action!  Everyone deserves to be happy and respected.   If you are trying to grow personally or spiritually, you may want to evaluate the people you want in your life and environment.  While you may not have a choice in some matters, you can choose your companions and friends wisely.  You also have a choice in your thoughts.  If you catch yourself thinking negatively, imagine placing your negative thoughts in a helium balloon and releasing it so it can be removed from you.  Bring in positive and nurturing thoughts that support you.

Second, it takes courage to “cut-off” people who continue to barrage you with their drama and chaos.  I encourage supporting people who need an “ear” or emotional support.  We all need to take responsibility and be accountable for 100% of our lives.  So, when a person is not willing to be responsible and take appropriate actions for their life, they are willing to stay in a place that may not be beneficial to them.  I realize that we all “slip” sometimes–even I fall short sometimes and get “de-railed”.   I am far from perfect and I have gotten caught up in other people’s drama schemes by trying to help them, while they are not taking any responsibility for their own lives.   Rescuing people does not  help them if they are willing to stay a victim of their own life.

None of us know how long we will be on this earth and how life will unfold each day. However, we have a lot of power in having positive thoughts and friends.  I am sharing a wonderful story that reminds me I have a choice in my life–to be happy or to be unhappy.  I chose to being happy and be responsible for my life. Life is good.

Good Wolf Bad Wolf

A traditional Native American story describes a boy who was feeling angry and upset at an injustice, who goes to his old Grandfather for advice. The Grandfather tells the boy that he, too has felt these feelings of hate and anger. The Grandfather shares that he has also realized how these feelings have no effect on his enemy, but they do cause him great pain.

“It is as if I have two wolves living inside me,” says the Grandfather. “One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.”

“But the other wolf,” Grandfather continues, “fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. The smallest thing will send him into a fury. He cannot think because his anger and rage are so great; however for all its fury, his anger changes nothing.

“Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”

The boy looks into his Grandfather’s eyes and asks, “Which one wins, Grandfather?”

His grandfather replies, “Whichever one I feed.”

Dawn smaller picture

Don’t be a Prisoner of the Past

/0 Comments/in /by

ForgiveHealing-Thyme-Services.pngHealing-Thyme-Services.pngI am constantly asked to give a healing session to someone in physical or mental pain. Nothing brings me greater joy than to give healing energy or hypnotherapy to someone in need.   As a young adult, I felt a strong calling to help people heal and feel better about themselves.  As a healing practitioner and hypnotherapist, I hear a lot of concerns about mental anguish and physical pain in clients.   I believe we stay ill or become ill because we are not letting go of our painful past and hurts.

Often I hear about traumatic events or people who have harmed others.  While this is very disheartening, we have to be able to forgive and live a life where we are happy and sharing our gifts to others.   Life is meant to be lived!  I learned to forgive so I could find inner peace.   There is no greater gift than inner peace and harmony. One thing I have noticed is that many clients and acquaintances who are suffering with health ailments are carrying baggage they should release.   The baggage is a painful past, perhaps someone has hurt them or they have experienced harm.  While I am not condoning bad behavior or mistreatment by others, I do advocate the health benefits of forgiving those who have hurt us.  Sometimes the person you may need to forgive is your own self.

Storing negative or toxic thoughts is harmful to our well-being.  Would you purposely want negativity to be stored in your body?  Holding on to grudges or feeling angry at someone can only create harm to our bodies.  Holding on to beliefs or thoughts that don’t serve you are called a non-serving belief.  What is a non-serving belief? It is a belief that you have “bought into” that may not be “serving” you or benefiting you. It may be holding you back from being successful or happy in your life.  Holding on to anger or being resentful about a past hurt can hold you back from being happy and healthy.  We all deserve to be happy.

Being upset at someone keeps us a prisoner of our thoughts.  Be a leader of your thoughts!  So, how did I start letting go of “non-serving” or toxic beliefs that were holding me back and keeping me unhappy? I got to the point where I was sick and tired of being “sick and tired”.   I no longer wanted to be a “victim” and I wanted to be empowered.  I began working on my own spiritual growth and personally chose hypnotherapy or hypnosis so I could begin to “break free” of the hurts in my past. I found great success in letting go of non-serving  beliefs and becoming a happier person.  It begins with forgiving our past and living our future.   People who forgive enjoy happier and healthier lives.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s Thyme to Heal

/0 Comments/in /by

Dawn pic for Newlife64Ever since I was a child, I have had a passionate distaste for injustice, especially when it came to mankind and animals.  As a child, I was an extreme introvert.  As I grew up and went into the Air Force, I found my voice and I also became an advocate for the less fortunate.   As a First Sergeant and an Air Force Recruiter, I was able to make a difference to the people I served.  I filled many roles as an advocate to help the less fortunate.  Perhaps I will never understand why  God wanted me to be an advocate.  I was painfully shy as a child and I thought I was destine to be that way for the rest of my life.

My 20 year career in the Air Force came with a few bumps and lessons.  While I was in the Air Force, I stood up to bullying and nepotism.  Anyone who has ever stood up against corporate America or the government knows that it may come with a high price.  It’s called retaliation and it can come in many different forms, even death threats.   I stood my ground and then dealt with hostility and retaliation for over a year, while serving in the Air Force.  One thing I learned while standing up to injustice was that my mother had more leverage and power than I did.  One letter to a two-star General and all of a sudden, I was transferred to sunny Florida as a remedy for the injustice I dealt with for over a year.   Years later, I look back and was glad for being an advocate for the Air Force’s Assignment system.  The program was now run by an ethical leader and special duty assignments were no longer managed on a bar room napkin.

As much as I love peace and order, I became an advocate again to stand up against bullying and nepotism in my present job.  Sometimes there is a high price for being a whistle blower.  I choose not to mention the details, but it came at a very high price to my health and well-being.  If I had to do it all over again–I would still stand up to injustice and face the price of being a whistle blower.  Why live a life full of lies and only exist? I have never been one to look for the “easy button”.   I have also never been able to look the other way, when I observe bullying, hostility, and injustice.  There are great leaders and humanitarians that I have always admired and wanted to emulate, such as Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King, and Mother Theresa.  I value the sacrifices they gave to make life better for so many people.  I also want to make a positive difference in this world.

I have truly never been a victim, but a person who is experiencing life and the lessons that go along with it.   My energy is now put towards being a healer and letting go of my old way of life.  As my final days wind down in my full time job and I transition into being a full-time “Healer”, I give thanks for the lessons of my experiences.  The lessons have taught me courage, patience, and above all compassion.  I certainly have “slipped” more than a few times when I thought I was a victim of my circumstances.  I am not perfect.  Beliefs affect our well-being and how we view our lives.  That is why it is so important to be positive and have positive intentions for our lives.  Energy really does go where we put it!

I am looking ahead and counting my blessings.  I look forward to practicing Reiki/Energy Healing,  Hypnotherapy, and Horticulture therapy full time.  My passion is helping others reach their full potential.  I believe that everyone has the right to be healthy and receive healing.   I will continue to be an advocate for worthy causes, but my passion is being a “Healer”.  I embrace it fully and thank God for choosing me to be a “Healer”.  I am now ready for the next chapter of my life and to continue on my spiritual path.  When there is love for mankind, there is great “healing”.

Dawn Westmoreland is a retired Air Force veteran, certified Reiki/Energy practitioner and Hypnotherapist in the Asheville, NC area.  She resides with a cat named Smudge and a dog affectionately named Toby.